My orders and preorders from Midtown comics by Archie Comics Collector
[Today at 01:44:49 PM]
did anybody read Cathy? by Oldiesmann
[Today at 01:07:57 PM]
A question about the new kids. by JonInIowaCity
[Today at 10:39:59 AM]
holiday wishlist by archiecomicxfan215
[Today at 10:10:08 AM]
What have you done today? by archiecomicxfan215
[Today at 09:50:49 AM]
favorite breakfast foods? by Steveinthecity
[Today at 08:43:55 AM]
Stan Goldberg in hospice care by Helvetica
[Today at 04:47:55 AM]
What would you do if Archie comics just stopped publishing the archie stories?! by Goldberg Fan
[Yesterday at 09:20:50 PM]
Archie's Girls Betty and Veronica? by spazaru
[Yesterday at 04:45:28 PM]
Sensational She-Hulk Issue 46-49 by Asdfghjkl
[Yesterday at 04:09:17 PM]
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Thanks for reading. I'm glad you like it the story.
Panel one: Jughead is at the Doiley front door as he prepares to knock. Over the door frame is an electric sign reading Doiley Resident in various scrolling colors.
Jughead: Okay, now let’s hope he’s home and not flying a rocket or in another dimension…
Panel two: Jughead’s fist barely moves as he tries to knock.
Panel three: Jughead’s fist still barely moves as he becomes annoyed and clenches his teeth.
Panel four: Jughead’s fist is almost at the door, but he gets annoyed and decides to just hurry the process up and yells for Dilton to come to the door.
Jughead: Aw forget it! Dilton! Hey, Dilt! Open the door!
Panel five: Dilton opens the door as Jughead smiles, forgetting about his fist as it heads for Dilton’s forehead.
Dilton: Jughead! Thank the second law of thermodynamics! I’ve been trying to reach the front door for hours to get help!
Panel six: Nearly the same shot only Dilton is rolling his eyes up at Jughead’s fist as Jughead looks on uncomfortably as he tries to use his other hand to stop his arm and fist to no avail.
Dilton: Um, Jughead…?
Jughead: Hate to tell you, but it’s slow, steady and not stopping!
Panel seven: Jughead’s fist knocks on Dilton’s forehead as Jughead twists his face and looks way as Dilton is getting bopped.
BOP BOP BOP
Panel eight: Jughead looks on apologetically as Dilton clutches his forehead.
Jughead: Sorry about that.
Dilton: How is it that I can build supercomputers and anti-gravity boots and not think to install a doorbell?!
Panel one: Jughead is waving his arms around as he is frantic and wants to know what is going on.
Jughead: Dilton, something is wrong! It took me too long to eat a burger so I stopped!
Jughead: IT TOOK TOO LONG FOR ME TO EAT A BURGER SO I STOPPED!!
Panel two: Jughead has stopped talking, but his arms are still flailing about as Dilton looks on inquisitively.
Panel three: Jughead exhales as he waits for his arms to stop as Dilton is fascinated by the discovery that Jughead seems only slightly affected compared to everyone else.
Jughead: And this kind of thing has been happening.
Dilton: But not as long as it should for everyone else. And only your arms…?
Panel four: Dilton is talking with Jughead as Jughead impatiently waits for his arms to stop flailing.
Jughead: I’m taking that cryptic observation of yours as a confession you’re responsible for this nuttiness.
Panel five: Jughead waits for Dilton to respond as Dilton doesn’t talk. Jughead’s arms continue to flail but are slowing down.
Panel six: Jughead leers at Dilton as he continues to wait as Dilton still has not responded. The panel is near identical to the previous only Jughead’s arms have almost stopped flailing about.
Panel seven: Dilton finally answers as Jughead rolls his eyes and his arms finally stop flailing. Dilton is in the same pose as the previous panels.
Panel one: Jughead responds to Dilton’s question as Dilton begins his explanation.
Dilton: Have you ever thought that the day has just flew by?
Jughead: Sure. In fact, if life was a comic, my day would normally cover just six or eight pages tops.
Panel two: A flashback in grey as Dilton is working on a high tech box as he is using a high tech laser screw driver on one side of the high tech box and whapping the box with the palm of his free hand on the other side. The box has a closed container lid with three off lights.
Caption: I decided that I could control time dilation—the difference between occurring events observed by different parties—so time is a separate individual timeframe by containing and harnessing a gravitational field.
Panel three: Still a flashback as Dilton proudly holds up the Bendix Box.
Dilton: And for that purpose I created—The Bendix Box!!
Panel four: Dilton is walking out of his lab as the Bendix Box turns on as all the lights of the flipped over lid are glowing brightly as a spreading gravitational field erupts from the Bendix Box. On several walls, camera monitors are stationed and pointed directly at the Bendix Box.
Caption: I left the Bendix Box set only to my lab so I can monitor the results from my lap top from a safe distance.
Caption: --But apparently the Bendix Box’s modulator was unable to regulate the flux of energy and began to constantly release a gravitational field!
Panel five: A shot of the gravitational field taking affect on Dilton as he is in his living room eating a sandwich as he sits on a high tech sofa as he is watching TV On his lap is his lap top that is flashing bright colors to show something has went wrong. On the screen of the TV is a mad scientist with brown out of control hair, a fat man dressed as a duck, and a ballerina balancing a test tube on her nose.
Dilton: I hate when an experiment goes awry during Beatman’s Universe!
Panel six: A high angle view of Riverdale as the gravitational field continues to expand all throughout Riverdale.
Caption: The gravitational field has engulfed all of Riverdale and continues to spread. Cars in the gravitational field are slow while those still outside are zooming with exhaust smoke showing them still going fast. A dog in between the gravitation field and out has his lower body still up in the air while his upper body rams into the ground.
Panel seven: A panel of the entire earth as the gravitational field has engulfed the entire planet as it glows with various fluxes of energy.
Caption: Night and day for the earth will be sunrise and sunset—but for us, it will be summer and winter!
Panel one: A close-up on Jughead as he stretches his neck.
Jughead: I don’t know how I should feel. I hate doing things quick, but I hate when it takes too long. I just like storing my energy.
Panel two: Dilton has a smile on his face as he comes to a realization on why Jughead isn’t affected as bad as everyone else.
Dilton: Eureka! That explains why you’re not as affected!
Dilton: We all have electromagnetic fields around our bodies, but your constant inertia has built up a charge dampening the Bendix Box’s effects on you!
Panel three: A close up on Jughead as he smiles to himself.
Jughead: If a potato can power a lightbulb, a couch potato can flip the light switch during commercials.
Jughead: So I guess it’s up to me. What do I have to do exactly?
Panel four: Dilton looks like he is going to say something as Jughead waits.
Jughead: Oh yeah. Different time frames.
Jughead: Wish I brought a Derby Dalton Triple Tripe digest with me…
Panel five: Same shot only with Jughead tapping his fingers across his leg as he sings to himself quietly as he rocks his body on his toes and heels as he waits for Dilton to finally say something.
Jughead: …Sugar oh honey, honey…you are my—take out that word and me with just candy…doo-doo…
Panel six: Same shot as panel two and four as Dilton is just barely opening his lips to talk as Jughead as Jughead anticipately motions with both arms as if trying to draw out the words from Dilton’s mouth by an imaginary rope
Panel seven: Jughead waves Dilton off as he enters the Doiley house as he leaves a confused Dilton outside.
Panel one: Jughead is in Dilton’s lab as the Bendix Box is on Dilton’s lab table with the top open as it is emitting the gravitational field energy into the air. Just at Jughead’s feet a robotic mouse is sticking his tongue out and making a face at a charging robotic cat as both are stuck in the time dilation.
Jughead: Funny. After all the Happy Meals, I never thought trouble could come from such a small box.
Panel two: Jughead is stepping over the robotic cat as it barely moves as it continues to run at the robotic mouse.
Jughead: So how exactly do I stop this?
Panel three: Jughead is at the lab table as he is scratching his chin and leans on the lab table as he tries to figure out how he should stop the Bendix Box. The robotic cat and mouse both have barely moved as it looks like the mouse is preparing to run away from the robotic cat.
Jughead: Dilton couldn’t tell me what to do.
Panel four: Jughead continues to think as he tries to decide what to do. The robotic cat and mouse still have barely moved as the robotic mouse has a small glow coming from his back.
Jughead: Okay, if a super brain caused this mess let’s think what someone on the other end of the spectrum would do.
Panel five: Jughead has just barely moved as he thinks to himself. The robotic cat and mouse have only moved and inch as the cat now has his claws out.
Jughead: And that would be Moose. What he do to solve this scientific catastrophe?
Panel six: Jughead has barely moved, but he has a smile on his face as he has decided on an answer. The robotic cat and mouse have barely moved as the robotic cat is an inch away from the robotic mouse as the robotic mouse’s back is glowing even more brightly.
Jughead: Something simple. So simple it’s brilliant!
Panel six: A shot of Jughead slamming the Bendix Box to the ground as the gravitational energy field is disrupted as the mouse suddenly spouts a jet pack and just zooms away from the confused robotic cat as it doesn’t understand why it didn’t get the robot mouse.
Robotic Cat: !!!!?
Panel one: Dilton is running into the lab as everything is back to normal as he does a small little skip in the air.
Dilton: Jughead, you did it! The universe is no longer decompressed! Everything is back to nomal!
Panel two: Dilton enters the lab as he sadly looks at his smashed Bendis Box.
Dilton: Aw! There was an off switch…!
Jughead: Is there a button that stops you from inventing universe threatening thingamabobs?
Panel three: Dilton is enthusiastic as he grabs Jughead by both shoulders and is beaming with joy. Jughead has an indifferent expression on his face as the job is done and he couldn’t care less anymore.
Dilton: But isn’t it amazing! After the decompression, stuck between the tick and tock of time itself, I have never felt more alive! It makes me value every second of the day!
Dilton: From now on I want to live life to the fullest!
Panel four: Jughead is yawning as he begins to walk out the lab as the robotic mouse is zooming over the robotic cat, which now has a butterfly net swishing after the mouse. Dilton looks on dumfounded as Jughead remains unchanged after everything, no shared epiphany.
Jughead: Me too..
Dilton: Where are you going?
Jughead: Home to take a nap.
Panel one: Jughead is sitting at the counter of Pop Tate’s as a burger is in a plate is right in front of him as he begins to salivate. In the background a teenager is about to walk into the shoppe and is about to slap a high five with a friend inside.
Jughead: Burger on the plate. Empty stomach. We’re going to switch that in just one second!
Panel two: Jughead is beginning to reach for the burger as he is still focused entirely on eating the burger. In the background the two friends have hardly moved at all as they are still several inches from slapping high five. Pretty much Jughead sans his right arm is the only person or thing moving normally through the page.
Panel three: Jughead hand has only moved slightly down as he begins to notice how slow he’s moving for some reason as he looks down at the burger. In the background the two friends have only moved another inch.
Jughead: Okay. Make that a minute.
Panel four: Jughead looks at his other hand and wiggles his fingers as is irritated at how long it is taking for his other hand to reach the burger. The friends in the background are an inch closer and needing only two more inches before their hands make contact.
Jughead: You seem to be working fine.
Panel five: Jughead is using his other hand to try and push his right hand towards the burger faster, but he only still has moved slightly. In the background the two friends are just an inch from slapping high five.
Panel six: Jughead scratches his head in confusion as he raises an eyebrow and examines his right hand as it is only a tad closer to the burger. In the background, the friends finally high five each other.
Jughead: I could have sworn Pop Tate served fast food.
Panel one: Jughead’s hand is finally on the burger as he exclaims in joy.
Jughead: There we go! Half the battle!
Panel two: Jughead’s hand barely raises the burger off the plate as Jughead is grimacing as he is trying to move faster.
Jughead: You’ve gotta be kidding me!
Panel three: Jughead is perspiring as he is trying to move his right arm faster but to no avail. Jughead has his feet on the edge of the counter as he is trying to pull back his right arm.
Panel four: Jughead tilts his head back and screams in frustration as he still hasn’t raised the burger hardly off the plate.
Panel five: Jughead has a light bulb over his head as his eyes light up. His right hand has only still barely moved.
Panel six: Jughead begins to lower his head at the burger.
Jughead: Fine. I’ll just meet it half way!
Panel seven: Jughead’s head barely lowers to match the speed of his right hand.
Panel eight: Jughead’s head barely lowers still and everything still is moving at a slow pace.
Panel nine: Jughead looks towards the reader as his head barely lowers and his right hand still is only moving ever so slightly.
Jughead: I hope this burger doesn’t get too moldy by the time I take a bite!
Panel one: Jughead has the burger half way to his mouth as he looks behind him to see Betty and Veronica having a conversation.
Veronica: So he said that?
Betty: He said that.
Veronica: His words?
Betty: He said that.
Panel two: Jughead continues to look on as Betty and Veronica stop and continue their conversation that doesn’t seem to be going anywhere. Jughead’s burger is getting a bit closer to his face cheeks as Jughead has seemingly forgotten about it.
Betty: I know. Wow.
Veronica: His Words?
Betty: Syllables and all.
Panel three: Jughead is becoming more irritated as Betty and Veronica are beginning to annoy him. The burger is only a few inches from Jughead’s face cheek.
Veronica: Syllables put together to make words?
Veronica: You sure?
Betty: I’m sure.
Panel three: Betty and Veronica continue to talk as Jughead rolls his eyes. The burger is only two inches from Jughead’s face cheek.
Veronica: I can’t wait.
Betty: Me neither.
Veronica: You can’t wait?
Betty: Can you?
Veronica: I can’t either.
Panel four: Jughead turns to yell at Betty and Veronica as they both turn in surprise at Jughead. The burger is only one inch from Jughead’s face cheek as he still does not notice.
Jughead: What is wrong with you? The sun sizzle your brains!?
Jughead: Why are you talking like that? No normal person would ever talk like that!!
Panel five: Betty and Veronica wave Jughead off as they walk off panel. Jughead is taken by surprise as the burger is up against his face cheek.
Betty: Definitely whatever.
Panel six: Betty and Veronica are off-panel as Jughead rolls his eyes towards the burger.
Jughead: Oh. You finally decided to show up.
Panel one: Jughead is letting go of the burger as it begins to drop back to the counter.
Jughead: I hate not to eat food this close to my mouth but I need to check something.
Panel two: Jughead watches as the burger has barely moved an inch as it falls back to the counter. Jughead has stretched his arms out away from the burger as he prepares to let it fall and show normal movement.
Panel three: Jughead tilts his head to the right as the burger only moves an inch closer to the counter. Jughead is rubbing his hands together to show that they are moving regularly.
Panel four: Jughead is twiddling his finger and whistling as he continues to wait patiently for the burger to drop to the counter, but it still has only moved an inch closer.
Panel six: Jughead is elbow dropping the burger with all his might, but it only moves an inch.
Panel seven: The burger is only three inches from the counter as Jughead lowers his head and tilts it sideways as he sticks his nose where the burger should land.
Panel eight: Jughead is writing on a piece of paper as sticks his tongue out to his left cheek and is focused on his writing as the burger is two inches from landing on the counter.
Jughead …And in conclusion to this five page essay, I hope to have proven how Global Warming, reality TV, and Reggie’s ego have affected gravity….
Panel nine: Jughead is fast asleep, his upper body tilted back as he looks dangerously close to falling backwards as the burger finally hits the table.
Panel one: Jughead is leaving the Chocklit Shoppe as he sadly pats his stomach as he is going to have to forget about eating. A thoughtballoon coming from Jughead’s stomach has the word ANGRY in bold, red letters.
Jughead: Sorry, boy. But if we eat that burger, we’re going to miss every other meal this week!
Panel two: Jughead has his right index finger on his nose as he tilts his head back to think.
Jughead: Either someone on a higher plane than us mere mortals needs to put a new battery in his clock…
Panel three: Jughead begins to walk down the sidewalk as puts his hands in his pockets and begins to walk away from the Chocklit Shoppe.
Jugehead: ….Or our resident super brain Dilton Doiley has been mad scientisting again.
Panel four: A shot of Jughead’s right foot as it is about to take a step.
Panel five: A shot of Jughead’s right foot as it is half way to the ground.
Panel six: Jughead’s right foot hits the ground as he prepares to take a step.
Panel seven: Jughead sighs as he looks around and realizes he has not made any traction and is only beginning to walk as he looks out in the expanding streets of Riverdale to show he has a long way to go.
Jughead: This could take awhile.
Panel one: Jughead is casually walking along the sidewalk as Archie is in mid fall after tripping over his untied shoelaces. Right next to him is Reggie pointing and laughing. In the background are two stores the first store is Pam’s Pillow Parlor and the other is Mark’s Marker Market.
Panel two: Jughead stops as he analyzes the situation as he puts his hand over his mouth and examines Archie and Reggie. Archie has only moved maybe an inch as he falls and Reggie’s laugh pose remains unchanged.
Panel three: Jughead looks behind him at Pam’s Pillow Parlor and Mark’s Marker Market as he tilts his head to his left. Archie has only moved an inch more as he is only a few inches from the ground.
Panel four: Jughead begins to walk out of the foreground and into the background towards the two stores as Archie is almost about to hit the ground as Reggie continues to laugh as time still has slowed down fort them
Panel five: Jughead whistles innocently along as he tosses a black marker back and forth in his hands as Reggie now has his laughing face marked all over and Archie is only an inch from landing on six pillows placed to keep him from harm. Both Reggie and Archie are still reacting like nothing Jughead has done has happened.
« on: August 13, 2014, 04:35:49 PM »
So Kevin Keller knows the answers to any mathematical problem?
I'll make a case for Alexander. I mean, yeah, Ronnie and Reggie have an ego, but they do kind of back a good chunk of it up.
Veronica is considered the prettiest girl in school and every guy wants to date her. Reggie is the star athlete and he does get the girls.
Alexander...he's kind of an arrogant dork who really doesn't accomplishment and just leaches off the talent of people way better than him and acts like he's the best there is. Heck, Alexandra deserves a mention as well.
Panel one: Jughead turns to Cynthia as Cynthia glare down at Jughead. Trula looks on curiously. Jughead shows off canine teeth to illustrate his point.
Jughead: Besides Dracula donating to a blood drive, I can’t think of a single more blood thirsty person than you. What is your problem with me?
Panel two: Cynthia begins to answer Jughead as Jughead quips back at her.
Cynthia: You don’t remember me at all, do you?
Jughead: No. And let’s keep it that way.
Panel three: A flashback that is set in a forest setting. A shot of Lil’ Cynthia wearing a pink dress as she is sitting on a rock with a mud puddle just behind the rock as she is happily looking at a bird on a tree limb happily tweeting. In the bushes, Lil’ Jughead is looking through the limbs as he becomes enraged.
Cynthia Caption: We first met when I was a little girl. I was minding my own business and just enjoying nature as I didn’t have a care in the world…
Panel four: A shot of Lil’ Jughead pushing Lil’ Cynthia off the rock as she is about to fall into the mud puddle. On the rock we can see a squashed pastry treat in a bag.
Cynthia Caption: …Until you came out of nowhere and pushed me into the mud! Scarring me for life!!
Panel five: Still the flashback as Lil’ Jughead sadly holds up his squashed Twinkie as a small tear rolls down his cheek. In the background Cynthia is covered in mud as she glares at Lil’ Jughead.
Jughead caption: Wait…I remember that.
Jughead caption: I put my Twinkie on that rock when I had to—well, I had a two liter soda an hour earlier—and I come back to find your big dumb girl behind flattening my poor pastry!
Panel one: Cynthia is nose to nose with Jughead as Jughead as they both give each other death glares and scream at the other at the top of their lungs.
Cynthia: You ruined my favorite dress!!
Jughead: You squished my Twinkie!!
Panel two: Cynthia grabs the arms of Jughead’s chair and wheels him away from the table as she towers over him as Jughead helplessly twists in the chair.
Cynthia: Because of you I can’t look at another boy without thinking they’re all vile wicked creatures!
Panel three: Cynthia begins to spin Jughead around rapidly in a blur as Trula finally bursts from her chair to help Jughead.
Cynthia: I’ve bided my time! Waiting for the right moment! And now I’m within ten minutes of absolute justice and extreme vengeance!
Panel four: Trula has stopped Jughead from spinning, but he is extremely dizzy as he has several planets and rocket ships buzzing around his head. Cynthia begins to leave the room as she smirks on her way out.
Cynthia: Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to make sure the preparations are set for you punishment.
Cynthia: Hope you enjoy Ciao: Hello in New York, Goodbye in Paris. It’s my favorite movie. I’ll be sure to hold your hand tighter during the kiss scenes.
Panel five: Jughead reluctantly looks up at Trula as he takes a deep breath and begins to inform her on what she needs to do. Trula raises and eyebrow in confusion as Jughead continues to speak.
Jughead: Go to my house. My mom should be home and tell her, “That Pat The Brat and Lil’ Jinx Hopscotch to CandyLand…”
Panel one: Back to the courtroom as Cynthia is giving her closing argument as she is pointing at Jughead. Everyone but Trula and the witnesses are in the courtroom. Jughead is trying to roll away from the defense table hoping no one is noticing. Diana does notice and is preparing to push him to the side of the defense table. In the jury the U.G.A.J. are raising a fist to show their solidarity. The rest of the U.G.A.J. members having their cell phones out recording Jughead and others are mockingly blowing him kisses.
Cynthia: …And in closing, I have proven that Jughead is the ultimate misogynist!
Cynthia: He has a pathological hatred for all women and that will spread like a disease to all our boyfriends and the world at large unless we deal with him at this very moment!
Panel two: Diana is wheeling Jughead in front of the defense table as Cynthia points out that Trula is not even there as Jughead becomes offended with Cynthia’s comments.
Cynthia: And for further proof of his guilt, that backstabbing, miserable, annoying, irredeemable friend of his has abandoned him!
Jughead: How dare you call her my friend!
Panel three: The Judge and Cynthia turn around as Trula calls off panel. Jughead seems disinterested even though he knows that Trula is there to help her as he shakes his head.
Trula: Why would I abandon a case, I’m going to win in a few moments from now?!
Panel four: Trula stands next to Jughead as Jughead nods in agreement as Trula motions up to the projection booth as a U.G.A.J. member is loading a disc into the projector. Cynthia is stomping her feet and protesting to the Judge as all the U.G.A.J. members look on in confusion and begin whispering to themselves.
Trula: I just had to leave to retrieve definitive proof that Juggers isn’t a woman hater but is suffering from a psychological disorder!
Cynthia: This is absurd! We’re at the closing statements! You can’t just backtrack!
Panel one: The Judge is nodding her head in agreement with Cynthia as Cynthia smirks at Trula and Jughead. Both Trula and Jughead reply with looks of disdain.
Judge: She’s right. This is a court. We have an obligation to maintain a certain structure and decorum.
Panel two: The U.G.A.J. member at the projection booth is yelling off panel for The Judge to allow it. The Bailiff rushes over and shakes the Judge’s arm as she wants to see the cute pictures. Cynthia glares at Jughead and Trula as Jughead sticks his tongue out at her and Trula just tilts her head back and smirks at her.
U.G.A.J. member at projection booth: Just do it, Judy It’s super adorable!
Judge: Sigh. Fine. Might as well check the projector out anyway…
Panel three: The screen is lit up with a home movie of Jughead dressed as a teddy bear jumping on a small trampoline as Jellybean looks on from the living room floor and is laughing and clapping her hands. Hot Dog is sitting on the living room sofa, looking up from reading the Riverdale Gazette and giving Jughead’s performance a small, sophisticated clap like a rich person would at an opera.
Teddy Bear Jughead: Teddy Bear on trampoline! Teddy Bear on a trampoline! Bounce Bounce! Yay Yay!
Panel four: All of the members of the U.G.A.J. (save Cynthia) in the room tilt their heads and give out an awe as they find Jughead playing with Jellybean adorable. Jughead holds his head down in shame as Trula puts a hand on his shoulder as she continues to watch the home movies. Cynthia turns around as she is unhappily surprised by the reaction of her group.
U.G.A J members: AWWWWWWW
Jughead: To save a pound of flesh, I just gave up every ounce of my pride.
Panel one: Trula is addressing the jury as she is pointing up a the screen as now Jughead is wearing at tiara and ballet skirt as he sits at a small child table and is drinking imaginary tea and invisible food with Jellybean, Alex ( a boy doll wearing a hat similar to Jughead I made in another fan fic), a doll of Sonic, and a doll of Megaman. In the movie, Jughead is gobbling down the imaginary food and is even swiping imaginary food from the Sonic doll. Jellybean is sipping her tea with her pinking up in the air. Jughead is hanging his head down as he tries to hide his face.
Trula: Jughead isn’t a woman hater at all. It’s a classic case of Big Brother/Little Sister Syndrome!
Trula: He loves his little sister so much that all his positive emotions towards females are directed at her and only the negative is left for the rest of us girls!
Panel two: The Judge and Bailiff continue to look at the screen as now Jughead is playing Legos with Jellybean as they have constructed a multi-colored fast food chain of restaurants; both are wearing toy construction hats and carrying tiny children’s tool boxes as they both wipe imaginary sweat from their brow. Cynthia is trying to protest, but the all the members of the U.G.A.J. are fixated on the screen and ignore her.
Cynthia: No! There’s no such thing! She’s making it up! And even still, he was horrible to us all long before his sister came along!
Judge: Has the jury reached a verdict?
Panel three: The lead juror stands up and has her hands cupped at her cheek as she is all smiles and cheer. As the rest of the jurors are still watching the home movies and continue to find the home movies adorable.
Lead juror: We have. We the jury find Jughead Jones not guilty of all charges—so he can rush on home to that sweet little snookums.
Panel four: Diana, who is the most cheerful she has been this entire story, begins to untie Jughead as Jughead despondently stretches his arms and legs out. All the U.G.A.J. members cheer the verdict and have a done 180 on how they view Jughead (at least temporarily.) Trula wipes her hands against each other as to signal the ordeal is over. Cynthia storms out of the room as she shakes her fists in the air.
Cynthia: IDIOTS! I’m surrounded by IDIOTS!!
Trula: How’s it feel to be a free man, Juggers?
Jughead: Bittersweet. Now that I’m not tied down, I guess I’m going to have to exert energy with walking and other movements.
Panel one: Jughead and Trula are walking out the theater. Jughead reluctantly gives the best he can to a compliment as Trula just rolls her eyes in response.
Jughead: Don’t let this go to your head—but today you weren’t as horrible as you normally are.
Trula: Superman can’t rescue ever cat stuck up a tree every time.
Panel two: Jughead and Trula turn their head as several people are approaching Jughead from off-panel.
Off-panel: THERE HE IS!!! GET HIM!!!
Panel three: Trula takes a step back as Jughead is being chased by Ethel, Toni Topaz, Mary Fine, Regina Mantle, Veronica, Betty, Joani, Debbie, Grizelda, and Sassy Thrasher (who is riding her skateboard). All the witnesses who did not see the home movies. Ethel is stretching her arms out and puckering her lips as she wants to kiss Jughead; the rest are the total opposite and look like they want to beat the stuffing out of Jughead. Trula looks on wide-eyed at the chase happening before her eyes. The title sign at Pickens Theater now reads THE END…? (with the ? mark sideways)
Jughead: Win your day in court and have to out run a lynch mob. It’s not perfect, but it’s the best system we got regarding male-female relationships!
Ethel: Come back! I love you!
Betty and Veronica: Speak for yourself!!
Toni Topaz: If this was an actual comic, I’d be on the cover!
Ask and ye shall receive. And thanks to everyone who is reading. Glad you're liking the story so far.
Panel one: A close up on a nervous Betty as she smiles and waves her hand.
Betty: Hi, my name is Betty Cooper. I like rainbows, helping people, and cute baby ducks.
Betty: And I swear to be honest to a fault and to tell the whole truth by golly!
Panel two: Trula is talking with Betty who has taken a seat on the stand as she puts her hand down and looks around anxiously. In the background Jughead looks on confidently as Cynthia glares ahead as she plots what to do.
Trula: Now, Betty, you’ve known Jughead longer than anyone in this room: can you please give us your opinion on the defendant?
Panel three: Betty stands up as she talks about Jughead.
Betty: He’s one of my best friends. He’s clever and smart along with being funny and witty. He’s always there when I need a shoulder to cry on and willing to lend a helping hand.
Betty: And most of all he’s humble and never gloats or tries to make anyone feel bad if they’re not doing so well.
Panel four: Jughead is scoffing at Cynthia as Cynthia glares ahead as she bites her lower lip as she becomes more enraged than she already was.
Jughead: Hah! Take that stupid girl! You stink at this and I’m going to get off scot free!
Panel five: Cynthia walks towards the stand as she clenches her fists; Her hair covers her face in shadow except for her angry cold blue eyes that are blazing. Jughead has a concerned look on his face as he sinks into his chair as low as he’s able as he can sense danger.
Cynthia: Just shut up and watch this, loudmouth.
Panel one: Cynthia brushes against Trula as Trula is going back to her desk, nearly knocking Trula off balance as she stalks towards Betty who tries to smile, but is clearly nervous at the harsh approach of Cynthia’s questioning.
Cynthia: Betty, you’re friends with Jughead. But that doesn’t mean he’s necessarily your friend, now does it?
Betty: Um, I don’t get…
Panel two: Cynthia is leaning in towards Betty and Betty protests and defends Jughead.
Cynthia: Veronica mentioned how Jughead liked to interrupt her dates with Archie, are you telling this court that he hasn’t done the very same to you?
Betty: No! He actually likes when me and Archie date!
Panel three: Cynthia continues to make her case as Betty looks over at the Judge for help, but the Judge is afraid and takes a side step away from the podium.
Cynthia: Really? How does he show his approval of you dating his best friend--a friend he obsesses over and refuses to share with another human being?
Panel four: Betty begins to think happily about how Jughead has treated her on dates with Archie.
Betty: Well, he always finds out when we’re dating and tags along and is always so excited that I can hardly get a word in when I try talking to Archie…
Panel five: Betty begins to realize that Jughead did not have her best interest in mind as her facial expression turns stern as she continues to reflect on her past dates with Archie.
Betty—And when I prepare a meal or treat for Archie, Jughead always tells me how good it was…after he sneaks into my kitchen—and eats the entire thing!?!
Panel six: Betty stands out of her chair and points an accusing finger at Jughead. Jughead is wincing and has a thought balloon of a cat leaping out of a bag to show that Betty finally caught on to him. Cynthia looks on proudly as Trula realizes that everything has just gone to heck for her case throws various papers in the air.
Panel one: Betty has gone nuts as she is climbing on top of the chair and trying to run at Jughead as the bailiff tries to stop her. The bailiff is motioning for more help as Betty has her hand right in her eyes and titling her head at an awkward angle. Cynthia pridefully looks on with a smirk. The Judge is banging on the gavel to try and regain order.
Betty: All this time—you didn’t want me to be with Archie?! All this time!!?!
Judge: Would someone help restrain the witness!?
Bailiff: Yes, please!!
Panel two: Jughead shrugs his shoulders as he tries to explain himself as Trula face palms as Jughead just continues to make the matter worse. Three more members of the U.G.A.J. rush past the defense table to help with Betty; one is rolling up her shirt sleeve and another is looking up and praying.
Jughead: Um, er…I can’t play favorites?
Panel three: Betty is being carried out by the three U.G.A.J. members as they are passing the defense table as Jughead and Trula look on. Betty tries to grab and kick at Jughead as the three U.G.A.J. members are just barely keeping her from escaping.
Betty: You fink! You sneak! You underhanded backstabber!
Panel four: Everyone in the courtroom looks on as Betty is being dragged out of the room on her heels as she shakes both fists in the air.
Betty: Throw the book at him! Throw an entire library at him! Write a series of books about how guilty he is, put it in the library, and throw the library at him!
Panel five: Jughead turns to Trula as Trula waves off the idea of helping Betty with her issues.
Jughead: Um, Trula, you know how you’re always looking for case studies to practice your psychology mumbo jumbo on…?
Trula: Sorry, but my amateur psyche kit didn’t come with a straitjacket.
Panel one: A shot of Sassy Thrasher taking the stand as she argues against Jughead while hugging her prized skateboard.
Sassy Thrasher: He said skateboarding wasn’t rad!
Panel two: A shot of January McAndrews as she points to her time police badge.
January: He won’t even give me the time of day!
Panel three: Toni Topaz is on the stand is motioning with one hand like a face that is eating.
Toni Topaz: During the last eating competition, he ate from his plate and mine!
Panel four: A shot of Grizelda from Jughead’s Diner with an open palm holding out a three pennies.
Grizelda: He didn’t pay female employees a penny less than the males—he paid us just three pennies!
Panel five: Mary Fine from the Archie Mysteries has taken the stand as she holds up a sock with a label on it reading EVIDENCE A
Mary Fine: He refused my help on the Mystery of the Missing Left Sock!
Panel six: Regina Mantle has taken the stand and she motions like she is throwing a pie.
Regina Mantle: …I throw a pie at his face to ruin his day, but he smiles and licks his face clean!
Panel seven: A shot of Jughead turning his head away and refusing to even acknowledge Joani and Debbie who are both at the stand and pointing and waving their arms around to get Jughead’s attention. The entire courtroom glares at Jughead, one of the juror’s is even cracking her knuckles. Cynthia looks over and makes the beheading signal with her thumb to her throat as Trula reacts by clenching he own throat as the case is going that bad.
Debbie and Joani: He won’t acknowledge our existence!!
Panel one: Court has been adjourned for recess as Trula and Jughead (still tied to the chair) are sitting at a table in an enclosed room with two U.G.A.J. members guarding the door. The walls of the room have various old movie posters and peeling wall paint. On the table is a soda with a straw inserted for Jughead and Trula is looking through her papers, obviously struggling to find a way out for Jughead. As she’s looking through the files, she is using her free hand to hold a sandwich for Jughead to eat.
Jughead: Bah! You stupid girl! You’re doing a horrible job, and I’m going get my comeuppance!
Trula: I’m doing a fine job considering how guilty you are. And please don’t bite my fingers.
Jughead: You’re holding a sandwich to my mouth. You know the risk.
Panel two: Trula is exasperated as she tries to find a way to sway the court. Her hand with the sandwich is off panel with only the tip of Jughead’s nose barely on panel.
Trula: You’re in for a long date-a-thon unless I can find a way to convince the court you’re loveable.
Panel three: Trula throws her hands (the sandwich already eaten off panel.) in the air as Jughead is now tilting his head to drink the soda with a straw.
Trula: If only there existed visual proof of you showing any sort of warmth or kindness to any female, but I’d have better luck seeing Big Foot riding a unicorn!
Panel four: Jughead stops drinking from his soda as he has sucked it dry and even crushed the can using only him sucking through the straw as he contradicts Trula.
Jughead: Hey, let’s not go that far. I mean, not every single female on the planet is as bad as…well, you for example.
Panel five: Trula eyes Jughead as Jughead turns his head and tries to remain vague about his comments as he is obviously holding back information from Trula.
Trula: Wait. You’re actually implying that you have proof of you being one hundred percent nice to any girl, unselfishly? No devious schemes?
Jughead: If that’s your inference.
Panel one: Trula is talking with Jughead as Jughead scoffs at her.
Trula: Then tell me where it is. It’s your only chance, Juggers.
Panel two: Jughead shakes his head as he absolutely refuses as Trula begins tapping her chin as she tries to think of a quick trick.
Jughead: Yeah right! You think I would ever give you that kind of information on me?!
Panel three: Trula feigns surrender as she sighs and tries to trick Jughead. Jughead eyes her warily as he senses she is up to something.
Trula: Fine. I guess you’ll be found guilty and have to put up with each and every member of the U.G.A.J.
Trula: Hour after hour, the smell of their perfumes, listening to their problems, being asked how they look every ten seconds or so…
Panel four: Jughead stands his ground as he sticks his nose up in the air. Trula rolls her eyes in annoyance.
Jughead: So I’ll have a brain aneurism or two. Big whoop!
Jughead: Nothing you or anyone else can say would make me show that collection of shame and humiliation to the public!
Panel five: Cynthia begins to enter the room as the guards part way. Jughead sighs as he rolls his eyes up and acts like he is talking to a higher power who is influencing the current events..
Cynthia: Jughead. Thought you and your attorney might want to plea bargain. It won’t work, but I would like to hear you plead for mercy.
Jughead: Sigh. I’m going to be tested, aren’t I?
« on: August 05, 2014, 10:30:29 PM »
I don't have a problem with it. I miss when comics were just fun for the sake of being fun.
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