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Jughead in "Kiss Crisis"

Started by beatman10, May 29, 2022, 11:37:11 PM

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beatman10

I have been working on a new fan fiction story featuring my favorite character, Jughead, Hopefully, this is the place to add it and, hopefully, you will all like it.
(the story takes place at the Riverdale Spring Fair, 2 months before Archie and the gang graduate from high school. Archie and Reggie are hanging out by the food stands watching Jughead do what he does best...EATING!!
Archie: Jug, that's the 5th time you got something to eat since you got here. And you've only been here for 10 minutes!
Jug: Sorry guys, but we were so busy at the Chock'lit Shop with the breakfast rush. I didn't get a chance to eat anything. (Chomp! Munch!)
Reggie: I hear everyone is raving about your cooking there since you started. You're like the Gordon Ramsey of the grill.
Archie: Yeah, dude, maybe you found your calling in life.
Jug: Well, I do enjoy cooking and coming up with new recipes. But, Pop told me he wants to retire in 6 years. And that may be the end of the Chock'lit Shop.
Archie: Maybe you can buy it from him then.
Jug: Where would I get the money for that?
Archie: Just a thought, Jughead.
Reggie: Alright Jug, since you're done stuffing your face, can we now go check out the scenery here?
Jug: Ahh Reg! "Check out the scenery"! That must be code for "We want to meet girls"!
Reggie: Yeah man. Why else would we be here? Oh, I forgot, Jughead doesn't notice girls!
Jug: I notice them! But I don't lose my head over girls like you 2 saps do!
Reggie: Hey Arch, "Lose my head over girls". That must be Needlenose's code for "My name is Jughead and I'm terrified of girls"
Archie: I think you're right, Reg. Hey Jug, when are you going to stop being afraid?
Jug: I'm not afraid of them.
Archie: Really? When was the last time you had a girlfriend?
Reggie: Or took one out on a date?
Archie: Or kissed a girl? And your Mom doesn't count!
Jughead: Guys, you know I'm way too smart to fall into that love trap. So, what I do is simply be friends with a few girls. We hang out, talk, walk around. And there's no romance, no pressure, no breakups. None of that complicated dating stuff!
Reggie: And who, pray tell, are these girls that you are "friends" with?
Jug: Hmmm. let's see. Betty, of course. Who would not want to be her friend? Also Ronnie, Nancy, Cheryl, Ethel, Trula, when she's not making me one of her experiments.
Archie: Wow, pretty impressive list there.
Jug: Oh, I forgot Midge.
Reggie: WAITAMINUTE!! You're friends with Midge? And Moose doesn't beat you to a pulp?
Jug: Moose trusts me, Reg. He knows I'm not out to steal his girl.
Reggie: Okay Jones. What do you and Midge talk about?
Jug: Just stuff. Like last week she told me she got a full scholarship to State U and she wants to own a business after college. I said I was happy for
her and told here she would make a great business woman. That's all.
Archie: Don't you worry one of these girl "friends" of yours may one day want more than just friendship with you?
Jug: Nah! All the girls are in love with someone else. Even Ethel has a new love. So I'm safe!
Reggie: Bah, I still think you're just chicken!
Jug: Ahh! I just saw a sign for Chicken tenders! Thanks Reg! I'll be right back guys! (Jughead runs back to the food stand)
Archie: He's hopeless!
Reggie: And whenever we talk about girls, he runs for food! He's 100% chicken!!
(Archie and Reggie hear a familiar girl's voice calling out to them. Betty Cooper)
Betty: Yoohoo, guys!
Archie: Betty! What's with the cheerleader outfit? Not the I don't like seeing you in it. Was there a game today?
(Betty runs up to Archie and Reg)
Betty: No, silly. Didn't I tell you about the fundraiser the cheerleaders are doing for the Riverdale Animal Shelter? For a 5 dollar donation you get to "kiss a cheerleader". All the cheerleaders are taking turns in the booth. It's over on the other side of the park.
Reggie: You mean like an old fashioned kissing booth? I thought those went out with pet rocks and mood rings!!
Betty: Nope!! And they work! We cleaned up moneywise last night. And it all goes to a good cause. And Archie, I'll be in the booth in a couple hours. And I'll be happy to give you some free samples!!
Archie: Yeah! I'll be there Betts!
Reggie: Who else is working the booth?
Betty: Well, Ronnie is the next hour and....
(Jughead is back without his tenders)
Jug: Can you believe they ran out of tenders? Oh, sorry! Hi Betty. Where's the cheerleading competition?
Archie: There isn't one. The cheerleaders are doing a fundraiser for the Animal Shelter today.
Jug: Well, I'd like to contribute.
Archie: Sorry Jug. It also involves kissing a girl which terrifies you!!
Betty: So, as I was saying, Ronnie's up next hour. And Midge is there now.
Jughead: Midge? How is Moose dealing with her kissing other people?
Betty: Not very well, Juggie. They had a big fight. Moose stormed off; said he be back in an hour and threatened to punch any guy he sees kissing her.
Reggie: Man, a chance to kiss Midge without her big, dumb boyfriend hovering over her? I'm going over there right now!
Archie: Right behind you, Reg.
Betty: (nervously) Juggie, I know this isn't your thing, You can stay here if you want.
Reggie: Oh no! Chicken Little is coming too! It's about time you learn about the facts of life, Jughead!!! Arch, you get one side, I'll get the other!
Jug: HEY! LEGGO OF ME!!
Reggie: Stop squirming, Jughead. This is for your own good!!
Betty: (hand over her mouth) Oh Dear! This is not going to end well!!
(The 4 friends walk over to the "Kiss a Cheerleader" booth with Jughead reluctantly being pushed along)
Betty: Hey Midge, Ronnie, how are things going since I left?
Veronica: Not good, I'm afraid. Nobody wants to make a donation with Midge in the booth. I think Moose drove everyone off with his rant.
Betty: Well, I brought a couple guys who will change that. What do you say, boys?
Reggie: Yeah! You go first Archie, then Mr. Chicken next. And I'll go last.
Archie: (suspiciously) Why are you going last, Reggie?
Reggie: Hey, because before me, Midge kissed the rest. With me, she'll be kissing the best!
Archie: Reggie, your modesty is overwhelming! Okay, I'll go first. Hey Midge, I'm here to make a donation. (Drops 5 dollars in the jar)
Midge: Awww! Me and the animals thank you, Archie! Mwwwahh! (kissing sound!)
(Archie walks back to Jug and Reggie)
Archie: See, Jughead? Nothing to it!! You're up, dude!
Jug: M-m-me?
Reggie: Yeah you, Chicken Boy! Get up there! It's time for you to man up!!
Jug: Okay! Okay! Quit pushing!! (Jughead walks up to the booth)
Midge: I don't believe it! I'm actually getting to kiss Jughead Jones?
Jug: Hey Midge, anything I can give to help unwanted pets get adopted I'll be more than happy to. Here you go. (Jughead puts a $20 in the jar)
Midge: Wow, Juggie, that is so sweet and awesome of you. Wait, were are you going? I owe you something.
Jug: You mean the kiss? That's okay Midge. We don't have to go through with it. I'll pass.
Midge: You don't want to kiss me, Juggie? I'm hurt!(pouty face)
Jug: It's not that I don't want to kiss you. I'm just.....
Reggie: He's a chicken, Midge! Always has been when it comes to girls! Haha!!
Midge: Leave him alone, Reggie!! Juggie, I get it. You're very shy which I find is so cute! But, I told you I want to own my own business one day and the number #1 rule is to "always give the customer what they have paid for". It wouldn't  be right for me to not give you what you paid for. So, you would be helping me out by kissing me. I know you're my friend and you do want to help me, don't you, Juggie? Look, all you have to do is close your eyes and pucker up. It's quick and painless, I promise!
Jug: Ah! What the hay! I'll help you out, Midge.
(They both move closer to kiss)
Betty:(Hands over her eyes) I can't watch!!
Archie: Betty, what's wrong? You're acting more nervous the Jughead!
(Jughead and Midge kiss. After the kiss....)
Jug: Hey Midge, that was kinda nice y'know? (Jughead turns to walk back to the others)
Jug: See guys? I didn't chicken out.
(Jughead feels a hand pulling him back) Where do you think you're going, Mr. Jones?
Jug: Huh? Midge? Is there something wrong?
Midge: Yes there is! You're going to kiss me like that and then just leave? I can't let you do that. (She wraps her arms tightly around the totally confused Jughead), You're not getting away from me this time, Sweetheart.
Jug: Midge, what are you doin,,,, MMMMFFT!!
(Midge kisses Jughead passionately before he can finish his sentence)
Midge: I've waited a long time for this moment,  Honey. (and continues to kiss Jughead all over his face)
Jughead: Midge, please!! I don't have enough money to pay for all these kisses!
Midge: There are on the house, Babydoll!!
Jug: Midge, don't you remember"? YOU'RE MOOSE'S GIRL!!!
Midge: I only want to be your girl. Yours alone, my love!
(Archie, Betty, Reggie and Veronica are all stunned by what's happening in front of them. Betty tries to calm Midge down)
Betty: Midge, please let go of Juggie. You don't want Moose to see this, do you?
Midge: Betty, you of all people know about my feelings! JUGGIE IS MINE NOW!!
Midge: Juggie, my darling, let's go where we can be alone and we can talk about our future together!
Jug: (Still being held tightly by Midge) If Moose sees us like this, I WON'T HAVE A FUTURE!!
(As fate would have it, Moose shows up and sees his girl with her arms wrapped around Jughead)
Moose: Ah ha!! So it's you, Jughead, trying to take my Midge away from me!! You know what this means?
Jug: EEP!!! (Midge immediately lets go of Jughead and pleads with her boyfriend)
Midge: Now Moosie, please! Juggie's innocent! It was me! I came on to him. I-I couldn't resist him!
Moose: Oh yeah, Midge? You couldn't resist him?
Midge: Please don't (POW!!! Moose sends Jughead flying end over end with his patented knuckle sandwich) hurt him (sigh)!!
Moose: Well, I couldn't resist punching that girlfriend stealer!! Come on, Midge, we're leaving! (He grabs Midge by the hand) And Jones, don't let me catch you 20 feet from my girl from now on, or you'll get worse! (He leads a tearful Midge out of the park)
Midge:(as she leaves) I-I'm so sorry, Jughead. (Sobs)
(The gang gathers around Jughead, who is still down)
Archie: Are you okay, dude?
Jughead: (sounding irritated) I'm fine!
(Jughead surprisingly springs back up and puts his cap back on and immediately runs over to Reggie)
Jug: You set me up, you jerk! You and Midge both did!!
Reggie:  Huh?
Jug: Don't play dumb with me. You've always had eyes for Midge and you figured the best way to cozy up to her it to get Moose to suspect someone else is trying to take her away instead of you. So, you and Midge must have come up with this plan to make me the culprit. I was a sucker to think Midge was my friend.
Reggie: Dude, I don't know what you're talking about. I had nothing to do with this.
Veronica: How can you accuse Reggie of coming up with such a ridiculous plan?
Jug: Because, he's an excellent prankster. But this time you've gone to far.
Betty: Jughead, listen to me. Reggie's telling the truth.
Jug: Come on, Betty,  you believe him?
Betty: Yes, I do.
Jug: Then why would Midge get all crazy on me like she did? Who made her do that?
Betty: YOU DID, JUGHEAD!!
Jug: Me? But I never tried to, y'know, get with her.
Betty: You didn't have to. You gave Midge something she's never had with any other guy....FRIENDSHIP.
Jug: Okay, so I'm her friend. I still don't get why she acted like that.
Betty: Because, dear Juggie, when you are with her, you treat her like she's a person and not a possession, or a trophy to be won from a rival. You've encouraged her to follow her dream of going into business. She was going through a rough time with her parents separation and you were there for her. She would have never applied for her scholarship if you didn't tell her to "go for it". Juggie, you were there for her when she needed you most.
Jug: But that's what friends do, Betty.
Betty: I know, Juggie. But I also know that true friendship can blossom into true love. Jughead, I'm not supposed to tell you this. But, Midge is crazy about you! (Reggie walks up to Jughead)
Reggie: Dude, after what I just witnessed, I have one thing to say. She's all yours, Jughead.  Hey Ronnie, can I help you get set up in the booth?
Veronica: You're a dear, Reggie. Let me give an early sample!! Mmmmnnn!! (Reggie and Veronica kiss and walk  toward the booth with arms around each other)
Betty: Juggie, you weren't supposed to know how she felt about you. She was afraid it would destroy the friendship and you wouldn't want her. I guess it doesn't matter now. She probably thinks you hate her.
Jug: I don't hate her.
Betty: Then you need to tell Midge your feelings. You and her would be perfect together. Jughead, Midge needs a guy like you.
Archie: Yeah, man. What do you say? I was just teasing about the  earlier "friendship turning into love" thing happening, but it really did.
Jug: Guys, I'm a realist. I'm not her type. Despite what happened, Midge has been with Moose throughout high school. She's Moose's girl and always will be. So, any chance that Midge and I would become an item now or in the future, is never going to happen. Never in a million years.
Betty:(dejected) I thought you would say something that, Jug. I'm just y'know...disappointed.
Archie: Hey, I'm getting hungry. Anyone else want to come with me to the food stand?
Betty: I'll go with you!
Archie: Jughead?
Jug: Naw. I'll stay here. For some reason, I'm not hungry now. (Jughead hangs his head low as if he lost his true love. Archie and Betty start walking to the food stand)
Archie: Man! Jughead turning down food? What's that all about?
Betty: I think I know, Archie. (Betty looks back at Jughead, who now has a tear running down his face, She smiles because she knows why Jughead is teary eyed) Jughead finally realizes when it comes to true love, he can NEVER SAY NEVER!!!
(The End)
I just wanted to have fun with these characters and write a prequel to the Married Stories which after 30 years, are what got me back into reading Archie comics again.








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