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  • Tuxedo Mark: My review of "Pranktober 31st" from Archie Double Digest, No. 303: [link]
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    August 10, 2019, 03:13:43 pm
  • Tuxedo Mark: Huh. I just saw it on Vomixology yesterday, but today there's an error message at the same link: [link]
    August 09, 2019, 09:20:52 am
  • DeCarlo Rules: Well, WOA 91 is not in comic shops until 8/14, so...
    August 09, 2019, 07:02:32 am
  • Tuxedo Mark: Okay, yeah, that's up (thanks), but World of Archie Double Digest #91 isn't.
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    August 07, 2019, 09:45:41 am
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    August 03, 2019, 10:27:42 pm

Archie in Resolution Desolation

Started by PTF, December 31, 2016, 06:22:55 pm

Previous topic - Next topic


 Archie in Resolution Desolation.

Page 1

Panel one: Setting is The Andrews Living Room as Archie, sitting on a couch, is writing on a piece of paper as he has his tongue sticking out to one side as he focuses on what he is writing. The paper has several puncture holes and rips in it because of how careless Archie has been as he holds it up instead of using a book to help making writing on the paper easier. Vegas is next to him juggling a doggie treat on his nose, trying to gain Archie's attention to no avail. Behind Archie, Mr. Andrews is looking on curiously.

Mr. Andrews thinking: Ah, yes, it's the day before the New Year and it looks like Archie's finally come up with his resolution.

Panel two: Archie holds up the paper in pride with both hands as Mr. Andrews looks on. Vegas is grumpily eating the dog treat as he knows he's not getting noticed and just given up on it.

Archie: I've done it! The perfect resolution to improve myself for next year!

Panel three: Mr. Andrews reads the paper as Archie cringes as he is surprised by his father.

Mr. Andrews "Always wear matching socks."

Archie: Yeep!

Page 2

Panel one: Archie stands up and motions for Vegas to give him support, but Vegas walks away and sticks his tail straight up. Mr. Andrews begins to lecture Archie.

Mr. Andrews: Well, I suppose it's better than last year's "always rewind my blu-rays" or the year before that and "I swear to never lose a freckle".

Archie: Well, um, Pop, you see...

Panel two: Mr. Andrews waves the paper at Archie as Archie shifts his nose to his left and right to avoid the left lower corner of the paper as Mr. Andrews waves the paper at his face.

Mr. Andrews: Son, I don't see why you even bother making a New Year's resolution when you make it so simple you could literally do it in your sleep!

Panel three: Archie lowers his head in shame.

Archie: I know, I know. It's just--well, I know that if I make it difficult resolution there's no way I'm going to be able to do it.

Panel four: Mr. Andrews points his finger at Archie as Archie is encouraged by his father's words.

Mr. Andrews: That's because you see the glass half empty instead of half full!

Mr. Andrews: Have you ever thought about what if you do succeed? Not only will you show inner strength but you'll be a better man each and ever year going forward!

Panel five: Mr. Andrews sticks out his chest in pride as Archie is inspired.

Mr. Andrews: Like me! I kept my New Year's resolution and I was rewarded with the greatest prize: Self-Respect!

Panel six: Archie jumps up in the air as he pumps a fist high as Mr. Andrews nods in approval.

Archie: I'll do it!!

Page 3

Panel one: Mr. Andrews is walking into the kitchen as Mrs. Andrews is washing a few dishes as she eyes him with a smile.

Mr. Andrews: Mary, I'm proud to say, I think I finally got something into Archie's head, and it looks like it may just take!

Panel two: Mary smiles as she dries a dish with a cloth as Fred becomes nervous.

Mary: Oh, I heard darling. It was riveting. Hairs on my arms stood right up.

Fred: Oh...well good.

Panel three: Mr. Andrew begins to poor himself a cup of coffee as he's right next to Mary as she puts the dish in the drainer with the rest.

Mrs. Andrews: Fred, if I remember, wasn't your resolution for this year, "lose fifty pounds"?

Mr. Andrews: It was and I did.

Panel four: Mr. Andrew mischievously smiles at Mrs. Andrews as Mrs. Andrews lets the very soapy dish water out.

Mr. Andrews: I reset the scales back each and every time before my self imposed weigh-in every four months or so.

Panel five: Mrs. Andrews playfully gives Mr. Andrews a kiss on his cheek and rubs a few bubbles on the left side of his chin as he smiles.

Mrs. Andrews: Can't argue with that logic.

Mr. Andrews: Because it's sound? Clever?

Mrs. Andrews: No. My resolution was to be more tolerant of my silly husband.

Page 4

Panel one: The setting is now The Chocklit Shoppe as Archie is taking giant strides towards Jughead, who is at the counter eating a cheeseburger. Jughead points back at Archie to Pop Tate as Pop rolls his eyes. In the background, a mother with a baby boy wearing a banner reading: 2016 is leaving as Trula Twyst, Chuck, Vic, and Maria wave goodbye to him.

Archie: Jughead!

Jughead: Hey, Pop, never mind putting this on my tab.

Pop Tate: Must be nice having a walking, talking, stumbling, fumbling, freckle faced personal bank account.

Panel two: Archie slams a piece of paper on the counter while using his other hand to hand Pop Tate several dollar bills, automatically knowing he's got to pay for Jughead's meal. Jughead has finished off the burger and is licking his mouth of sauce.

Archie: I'm challenging myself! I'm going to make a big change this coming year! A new starting point for my life!

Jughead: If you can't keep up a bi-monthly schedule, I'm not interested.

Panel three: Jughead reads the paper as Archie's bravado fades.

Jughead: "I'm only going to date Betty or Veronica."

Panel four: Jughead turns to Archie as pulls at his hair to show how conflicted he is.

Jughead: Arch, pal o' mine, this isn't a new year's resolution, this ever day of your life since you were six.

Archie: Argggh! I know! I know!

Panel five: Archie sits down next to Jughead as he looks down forlonely at the paper. Jughead holds out his hands like a scale balancing between two items of near equal weight. Jughead is licking his lips as he thinks about the invisible food in both hands.

Archie: It's just so hard to pick just one! They're both so great!

Pop Tate: Archie, when I'm deciding what to put for the special of the month, I weigh the pro and cons of each.

Jughead: I can help with that.

Archie: Yeah...that might work...

(PAGES 5 + 6  are two panels across, three down to break up the pro and cons)

Page 5

Panel one: Betty is holding Archie's hand as they are walking up to a staircase as she is eager to show Archie something as she pulls him along as they both smile at each other.

Caption: Pro: Betty loves me totally, unquestionably.

Panel two: Betty is opening the door to her room and showing off her Archie-centric decoration as she has various posters, flat heads, and pictures of Archie on the walls. A bed sheet and pillow covers with Archie's face on them. On the bed is a teddy bear modeled after Archie. Archie is looking on in shock from the door frame as Betty motions with his arms for him to come in. Archie looks on apprehensively.

Caption: Con: She can be possessive.

Panel three: Betty is holding up a little bird that has fallen from his next as Archie looks down at it sympathetically. Both are kneeling.  Behind them is the tree that extends past the panel so the reader doesn't have a clear cut idea on how tall it is.

Caption: Pro: Betty is caring.

Pane four: High angle view. Archie is climbing a fifty foot tall tree with one hand as he tries to put the baby bird back in its nest. Archie is biting on to a limb and using his free hand to stay up as his feet are dangling. Soaring at him is an angry mother bird. Betty is nearly a dot from the high angle view.

Caption:  Con: She can care too much.

Panel five: Betty and Archie are walking into The Cooper living room as Mr. Cooper is reading his paper on his chair with the TV on and Mrs. Cooper is vaccuming. Each Cooper parent waves hello to Archie.

Caption: Pro: Betty's parents like me.

Panel six: A dejected Archie looks on at the aftermath of havoc his clumsiness has caused as Mr. Cooper sadly looks down at his broken chair and the vacuum has broken in the container and sprayed Mrs. Cooper with the dirt she had collected. Also there is a giant hole in the wall and the TV is on fire Betty gives Archie a pat on his shoulder. Mr. Cooper has a thought balloon of a dollar bill with wings flying out of an empty wallet.

Caption: But they don't like having me over.

Page 6

Panel one: The setting is the beach as Veronica and Archie (Both in swim suits) are running down the shore line arm in arm as they are enjoying each other's company and having fun.

Caption: Pro: Veronica is fun.

Panel two: Archie looks over to see that Veronica is gone from his side. In the background, Veronica is surrounded by several beach hunks who are gushing over her as she happily basks in their admiration. One is offering her an ice cream while another is on his knees proposing.

Caption: Con: Veronica likes to have fun with other guys.

Panel three: A shot of Archie and Veronica in a forest with other people as they are all wearing a shirt reading SAVE THE WOODS. Archie and Veronica are handing out fliers to various people as they walk by. Archie is looking at another female volunteer handing out pins as small hearts are over his head. Veronica rolls her eyes towards Archie as she hands a small child a green frisbee.

Caption: Pro: Veronica is a lot more loving and caring than she lets on.

Panel four: An enraged Veronica is chasing Archie past the female volunteer as she has a giant tree limb over the back of her head with both arms as she plans to clobber Archie as Archie scrambles for his life.

Caption: Con: Veronica has a temper she gladly shows everyone.

Panel five: Veronica is welcoming Archie into The Lodge Mansion as he looks around at all the antiques, paintings, and high tech television as Veronica smiles proudly.

Caption: Pro: Veronica welcomes me into her home with open arms.

Panel six: Mr. Lodge is tossing Archie out of the house as Archie lands on his stomach and does a belly flop.

Caption: Con: Mr. Lodge escorts me out of his home head first.


Page 7

Panel one: Archie has both elbows on the counter and chin in both the palms of his hands as he looks down at his resolution. Unnoticed by Archie, Betty and Veronica are walking up towards him. Jughead tries to get his attention.

Archie: I just can't do it! I just can't pick between the two!!

Jughead: Um, Archie?

Archie: I know, I know, I've hard years but I just can't decide!!

Panel two: Betty sticks her head at Archie's left shoulder as Jughead just turns back around in the stool as he waves it off. Archie's eyes bug out as he is startled.

Betty: Can't choose what, Archie?

Panel three: Veronica sticks her head down to Archie's right as she looks down at the note. As Archie freaks out even more.

Veronica: What have you there, Archiekins? A love note for moi?

Panel four: Betty and Veronica each lean over to read the note as Archie sighs and tilts his body back as far as he can as he sadly looks on knowing he can do nothing.

Panel five: Betty and Veronica both give each other the stink eye as Archie remains the same as the last panel.

Panel six: Betty and Veronica both turn to Archie and point at each other as they startle Archie enough for him to fall backwards out of his stool.

Betty and Veronica: PICK ME!!

Archie: AAH

SFX: Plop

Page 8

Panel one: Veronica suddenly calms down and waves off the argument as Archie sits up relieved. Jughead is surprised while Betty is suspicious.

Veronica: Oh, this is silly and I refuse to let this escalate over a silly paper for an archaic custom. Archie shouldn't be so hard-pressed to make a life altering decision.

Archie: Really?!

Panel two: Veronica pulls out a pin and has it over the paper as Betty looks down and notices something suspicious. With her free hand, Veronica blows Archie a kiss. As Archie have eyes for hearts.

Veronica: Of course. In fact, I'll just deal with this silly little paper and everything will be the same as it ever was.

Betty: !!

Panel three: Betty grabs Veronica's wrist to stop her from marking up the paper. Veronica's pleasant attitude turns rough as she practically snarls at Betty.

Betty: Not so fast!

Veronica: What do you think you're doing!?

Panel four: Betty motions her head down towards the paper as the pin is above the "Betty or" section of the paper. Jughead looks on angrily while Archie is disappointed.

Betty: It's what you were trying to do! You were going to only mark over "Betty or"!

Veronica: I'll have you know I was going to start in the middle and mark left to right! It's how all the privileged mark over a mistake!

Panel five: Veronica looks over Betty's shoulder as Betty turns her head and takes her eyes off Veronica. Veronica slowly is moving the paper up towards the pen tip.

Veronica: And another thing--say is that a lost child looking for his or her mother?

Betty: What? Oh, you poor thing, I'll help you find...

Panel six: Betty snaps her head back just in time. Betty uses both hands to move the pen away from the paper as Veronica tries to get the paper to mark over Betty's name.

Betty: Hey!! Why you dirty sneak!!

Veronica: Dirty? You're the one with grime under her fingernail, bubblehead!!

Page 9

Panel one: Jughead is reaching over Betty to grab the pen as Betty turns to him.

Betty: Don't try and stop me, Jughead!

Panel two: Jughead begins to cooperate with Betty as they team up against Veronica. Betty smiles at Jughead while Jughead smiles back at her.

Jughead: Stop you? I'm trying to help you!

Betty: Oh. Well, thank you.

Panel four: Veronica scream as she struggles to keep Betty and Jughead at bay with one hand as they are both working together against her. With her free hand, Veronica has the paper behind her sticking out away from the pen now as the other two begin to move the pen towards the page.

Veronica: Two against one isn't fair!!

Panel five: Veronica uses her free arm to move the paper away from the pen as Betty and Jughead have a stale mate with Veronica as Veronica struggles to keep the pen away from the paper. Archie looks on in vain at what he seeing.

Betty: Juggie, are you even trying??

Jughead: For once in my life!

Veronica: You two think you're the first of the unwashed masses to oppose a Lodge?!

Page 10

Panel one: A close up on the pen as it is about to burst from the pressure Veronica's hand and both of Betty's and Jughead's are putting on it.

Panel two: A shot over all three as ink squirts out from the tip and hits the paper Veronica is holding high above the back of her head.


Panel three: Veronica slams the paper down before it gets on her hands.

Veronica: My manicure!

SFX: whm

Panel four: Archie looks down ecstatically to see that the paper has ink all over it, making it null and void. Betty and Jughead look on in disappointment while Veronica checks her manicure to see it's okay and breathes a sigh of relief.

Archie: The resolution! It's covered in ink! Do you know what this means?

Panel five: In the background ,Archie kicks his heels as he jumps for joy as he leaves The Chocklit Shop. Chloe and Bobbi shrug their shoulders as they watch Archie. Betty, In the foreground, Jughead, and Veronica eye the ruined resolution as they all share a light bulb over their heads.

Archie: It's null and void! I can make a new one!

Page 11.

Panel one: Archie is at his computer desk as he has a post-it with his resolution on his computer that reads: NY RES: Never keep my my eyes open and sneeze at the same time. On his computer desk is a wallpaper of Betty and Veronica each making half a heart and joining together with the other.

Archie: There! It may be simple, but I can do it!

Archie: At least we all learned a lesson from today.

Caption: Really, Archie? I wonder...

Panel two: Betty is on her computer as she has a document up in large print: NEW YEAR RESOLUTION: ARCHIE WILL FALL HEAD OVER HEELS IN LOVE WITH ME! Under the letters is a picture of Veronica with Betty using MS paint to draw a mustache and devil horns on her.

Betty: Feels better putting in into writing...and art.

Panel three: Veronica is using a quill pen as she writes on a blank papyrus scroll.  On the scrolls reads: ARCHIE ANDREWS WILL BE MINE---VL!! MR. Lodge looks over Veronica's shoulder in horror that she ruined a prized treasure and looks like he could feint.

Hiram Lodge: Veronica! What have you done to that scroll??

Veronica: Winning at love and making history, Daddykins.

Panel four: Jughead is in his room, on his bed, eating a slice of pizza as he has a marker and is writing on the lid of the Segarini's pizza lid reading: N Y RES: Make sure Archie does not date any girl.

Jughead: Shoulda thought of this years ago...

Caption: To our readers, HAVE A HAPPY NEW YEAR!!


The Archie character names and likenesses are covered by the registered trademarks/copyrights of Archie Comic Publications, Inc. and are used with permission by this site. The Official Archie Comics website can be visited at www.archiecomics.com.