Panel one: Betty and Veronica are near a Cosmo soda machine in the hallway of Riverdale High as the school day is beginning. Both girls are looking at Archie as he is across the hall trying with both arms to keep his books and notes and various other items from falling out of his locker. Veronica has a purse draped over her left shoulder while Betty has her back pack in her right arm dragging on the floor. The Riverdale Bulldog mascot has a pink puppy dog backpack and a doggie bag as he makes his way amongst the students going up and down the hall to their classroom or taking or placing books in our out of their lockers.
Veronica: Sigh, look at my Archie, Betty. Isn’t he suave?
Betty: And handsome, Veronica.
Panel two: Both Veronica and Betty turn to each other as they say the same thing at the same time.
Veronica and Betty: He’s the man of my dreams!
Panel three: Betty is poking Veronica’s face cheek with her right hand and pinching her arm with her left hand as Veronica reacts in shock and pain.
Betty: Pinch and a poke! You owe me a coke!
Panel four: Betty smiles triumphantly as Veronica glares at her and shakes a fist in her direction. She uses her other hand to rub her face cheek that had just gotten pinched.
Betty: You snooze, you lose, Ronnie. Remember, by girl code, you can’t talk until you give me a soda.
Panel one: Veronica uses one hand to wave off Betty’s comment and the other to point at the Cosmo Soda machine just behind them as she grins arrogantly.
Betty: Yeah. I guess it’s not going to be for long.
Panel two: Veronica is reaching into her purse and diamond encrusted dollar pouch as she begins to take out one of several thousand dollar bills.
Betty: Yowza! You could buy a soda franchise with your allowance!
Panel three: Betty looks on worriedly as Veronica is shoving the thousand dollar bill into the soda machine. Veronica turns her head and scoffs at Betty’s suggestion.
Betty: Ron, maybe you should use smaller bills. The label says it only takes 1 and 5 dollar bills.
Panel four: The soda machine is beginning to overload from the large bill as Veronica doesn’t notice as she has turned away and is using her free hand to mimic Betty’s mouth. Betty notices sparks coming from the money slot of the soda machine.
Panel five: The soda machine begins to spark as both girls step back as it shake violently to the point it is causing the ground to shake as the two girls cling to each other for support. Various other students passing by don’t fair much better. Especially one student who has his arms full with his paper-mache volcano as it erupts baking soda right up to the ceiling of Riverdale High.
Panel six: The machine is charred and has become warped like a squeezed soda can. The machine now reads OUT OF ORDER just above the money slot and the soda options are now totally blank. Betty is rubbing the back of her head as she assesses the damage while Veronica points at Betty while she uses her other hand like she is zipping her mouth shut as her way of telling Betty to ZIP IT! Just behind the girls we can see a puddle of baking soda.
Betty: Told’ja so.
Panel one: Archie is coming over to the girls as he is looking around nervously and weaving his way past various students who are lying on the floor covered in baking soda. The kid with the paper-mache volcano is the worse as he looks like a living marshmallow with shocked bulging eyes. Veronica innocently backs towards the soda machine as if to cover it up and shrugs her shoulders and puckers her lips to seem like she is whistling harmlessly. Betty looks at Archie and taps her chin with her index finger as she comes up with a scheme to take Archie from Veronica.
Archie: You girls okay?! It’s like a sumo wrestler stepped on a fault line!
Panel two: Betty is wrapping her arm around Archie and is leading him away from a stunned Veronica.
Betty: Archie, do you think we can sit together in 5th period, and together at lunch, and have a study date and then just a date?
Archie: Gee, Betty, I promised Veronica that—
Panel three: Betty continues to lead Archie away as Veronica, here eyes focused on Betty, is behind them as she punches back at the soda machine right at the Cosmo mascot as it seems to wince in pain from the blow.
Betty: Now, Archie, if Veronica minded I’m sure we would have heard something from her by now, don’t you?
Archie: I guess.
Panel four: Archie and Betty are walking off in the distance as Betty skips along side Archie as she stills makes sure Archie can’t turn around to see Veronica. Veronica is shooting daggers at Betty with here eyes. Over Veronica’s head is a thought balloon of Veronica strangling Betty until she turns blue with her tongue hanging out to her side. Svenson is using a leaf blower to clean up the science fair project student and other students who smile in approval. The science fair student’s face is being pushed back to the point he looks almost like Popeye the Sailor. The Cosmo mascot on the soda machine now has a black eye and missing teeth from the blow Veronica gave it.
Archie: Huh. I really thought Veronica would be upset and throw a fit.
Betty: Oh, I’m sure what Veronica’s thinking is nothing but the best.
Panel one: Veronica is stomping her foot as her face cheeks are bright red. Behind her the mascot drawing of Cosmo on the soda machine is backing away from the raging Veronica as it uses it’s arms as shields as it doesn’t want to be hurt again. Walking up to Veronica is Jughead who has a can soda that he is preparing to drink. Jughead is tapping the top of the soda so it doesn’t spew.
Jughead: So the next dance sensation or another hissy fit from Riverdale’s princess?
Panel two: Veronica eyes Jughead’s soda and points at it as she is filled with relief.
Jughead: Huh? Oh this is a carbonate beverage. It’s what we peasants drink in lew of nectar.
Panel three: Veronica is on her hands and knees as she is begging for the soda as Jughead tilts his head in confusion.
Jughead: So…you want this can of soda…?
Panel four: Veronica nods her head rapidly with a giant smile on her face as Jughead smiles back and gives her a thumbs up.
Jughead: Oh. I gotcha. Sure, Ronnie. What are friends for?
Panel five: Jughead tilts his head back as he lets the soda go into his wide open mouth as he gulps it down as small lumps of soda goes down his long stretched neck. Veronica is crawling on her knees and waving her arms frantically for Jughead to stop.
Jughead: gulp gulp gulp
Panel six: Jughead is burping as he is walking away after leaving Veronica with the empty soda can. Veronica is so upset that she slams the empty can into her forehead and completely flattens it.
Jughead: There you go. The can. Be sure to recycle it for when you’re done, Veronica.
Panel one: Veronica is beginning to stand up as she is dismayed as the one minute bell rings and students begin to go into classrooms. The science fair student from earlier looks on dejectedly as a line of students are carrying better and bigger paper-mache volcanoes than him as his paper-mache volcano is now warped and soggy.
Intercom: Remember students, one minute to get into your first period class. I repeat, one minute.
Panel two: Veronica slumps her shoulders and seems resigned into her newly appointed vow of silence as she enters Miss Grundy’s classroom as Ginger Lopez and Adam wonder what is wrong with her as they are just outside of the classroom talking.
Panel three: Veronica is inside of the classroom as she is raising her arms to motion towards Miss Grundy whose attention is completely in her roll book as she checks off names. Around Veronica, Ethel, Moose, Chuck, and Frankie look at Veronica in confusion as they don’t know what’s wrong with her. Nancy is in front of Veronica as she raises her arm as she confirms she’s here. Next to Nancy are two random students playing paper football as a real football is being thrown from outside into an open classroom window and heading their way.
Miss Grundy: Nancy?
Miss Grundy: Veronica?
Miss Grundy: Veronica Lodge…?
Panel four: Miss Grundy looks up from her attendance book as Moose points at Veronica who is now standing up with her jaw dropped from Miss Grundy’s comment. Veronica has her right hand just below her neck to illustrate how she feels insulted. One of the random students has the football jammed into his mouth as the other student tries to pull it free.
Moose: Duh, Veronica’s here, Miss Grundy, but I don’t think her vocal box is working.
Miss Grundy: Oh my! Veronica not talking! This might be pleasant if not serious!
Panel five: Miss Grundy motions towards the door as Veronica, with her head held down and back bent begins to dejectedly leave the class room.
Miss Grundy: Veronica, go see Nurse Robin.
Miss Grundy thinking: My. Look at that poor form. She must be awfully sick. I’ll send word to Mr. Weatherbee…
Panel one: Nurse Robin (a middle age woman in her forties with graying black hair and wearing typical nurse clothing) is using a small light to look into Veronica’s mouth as Veronica is sitting on a nurse bed. One pillow on the bed seems to be reserved for Reggie Mantle with a tag reading: He’ll Never Learn. The room is decorated with bird wall paper and various hand sanitizers on the walls. On a nearby desk is large over stuffed folder reading: ARCHIE ANDREWS ACCIDENTS and another even bigger folder reading: CAFETERIA FOOD.
Nurse Robin: Odd. No swelling of the tonsils even…
Panel two: Nurse Robin is talking with Veronica as Veronica lets out a sigh.
Nurse Robin: I don’t see why you can’t speak, Veronica.
Nurse Robin: Maybe it’s all psychological?
Panel three: Suddenly Mr. Lodge bursts into the room as he is clearly panicked that something could be wrong with his daughter. Nurse Robin takes a step back as he charges into the room. In the hallway we can see a trampled hall monitor that Mr. Lodge had just plowed through as the kid vainly still his hand extended in a stop motion.
Mr. Lodge: Veronica! I just got a call from Mr. Weatherbee! Utter a syllable! Ask for a new dress! Say anything to your daddy!!
Panel four: Veronica tries to use sign language vainly to communicate what she is saying as she swishes her arms around as a caption box just at the bottom of the panel is there to communicate what she is saying. Nurse Robin and Mr. Lodge focus on what Veronica is trying to communicate.
Caption: I am a platypus. I go to Mars. My favorite color is cardboard.
Panel five: Nearly an identical shot as all three look down at the caption.
Panel six: Mr. Lodge hugs his daughter as he’s worried she’s sick while Nurse Robin looks like she’s going to cry. Veronica has her head over Mr. Lodge shoulders as she rolls her eyes and twists her face in a “why me” type facial expression.
Mr. Lodge: Don’t you worry, Veronica!! I’ll get the best doctors!!
Panel one: A shot of a Lodge Jet as it streaks across the sky as a flock of birds are flying in an E formation much to the confused pilot’s bewilderment. The Lodge Jet stretches across the sky and has #25 on it to show that the Lodges’ have at least twenty four more jets like this.
Mr. Lodge inside of the jet: Don’t worry, Veronica! Daddy is here!
Panel two: Inside of the massive jet we see Mr. Lodge and Veronica in the middle seat of the massively roomed jet which includes a fifty inch TV, a sports bar, and even a mini golf course. Mr. Lodge and Veronica are sitting in golden and diamond encrusted seats as Mr. Lodge has an arm wrapped around Veronica as Veronica has hear elbows at her knees and her head in her open palm as she stares out dejectedly.
Mr. Lodge: We’re going to see the best speech specialists in the world!
Mr. Lodge: I swear I will hear you ask if Archie can come over, and I’ll tell you no just like always!
Panel three: Outside of a hospital that is nearly seven stories tall with a giant mouth and a red hospital cross as a log as we can see through tinted glass windows of two doctors all dressed in white gowns and wearing face masks and rubber gloves as one of the doctors has a tongue depressor on Veronica’s tongue. At the ground level we see a sign reading Dr. Johnson/Johansson you will say Yes/Jah! Climbing on the wall of the Speech Hospital is a Human Fly as a Arachno-Man is swinging at him with his webbing, using his free hand to rub his stomach to motion that he’s hungry.
Mr. Lodge: Dr. Johnson, Dr. Johansson! Tell me, what you’ve found!
Panel one: Inside of the hospital room as Dr. Johansson (Slightly smaller than Dr. Johnson and a bit plumper) has the tongue depresser on Veronica’s tongue as Dr. Johnson (Taller, wears glasses, and has a blond split curl sticking out from doctor’s hat) tells Mr. Lodge their finding as Mr. Lodge rolls his eyes. Veronica glares at her doctors as she has a thought balloon of two donkeys as doctors to show what she really thinks of the speech specialists.
Dr. Johnson: Good news! She has a tongue!
Dr. Johansson: Ja! Dat’s good start!
Panel two: Mrs. Lodge in a purple dress and white elegant purse walks into the doctor’s office as Mr. Lodge rushes towards her. In the background, Dr. Johnson is tapping Veronica’s forehead with his knuckle while Dr. Johansson is pulling at Veronica’s left ear. Veronica is obviously irritated at the two bumbling doctors.
Mrs. Lodge: When I got your text, I flew right over. Now what is this all about, Hiram?
Mr. Lodge: Hermione, something is deeply wrong with our Veronica!
Panel three: Veronica is punching Dr. Johnson’s stomach and kicking Dr. Johansson in retaliation as her face is red with rage and her teeth are gritted. In the background, Mr. and Mrs. Lodge look on.
Mrs. Lodge: She seems normal to me.
Mr. Lodge: She’s aware! She’s cognitive! But the last time anyone heard her utter a syllable was when she and Betty were dropped off for school.
Mrs. Lodge: Hm? Is that so…?
Panel one: Mrs. Lodge is looking at Veronica as Veronica looks hopeful at her to the point she is nearly brought to tears.
Mrs. Lodge: Veronica…you didn’t happen to speak with Betty last, did you?
Panel two: Veronica happily nods her head to reply as Mr. Lodge continues to query her daughter as she’s beginning to understand what happened. Mr. Lodge and the two doctors look on with amazement.
Mrs. Lodge: You wouldn’t happen to have said the same thing at the same time…?
Panel three: Mr. Lodge places a hand on each of Veronica’s shoulders as Veronica has her head lowered in shame.
Mrs. Lodge: Honey, you and I practice every night to avoid this! A teenage girl always has to be on her guard!
Panel four: Veronica looks excited Mrs. Lodge hands her four quarters in her palm and motions for Veronica to leave.
Mrs. Lodge: Now you got get a soda out of the machine down the hall and take my personal jet back to Riverdale High before you miss your next period.
Panel five: Veronica is dashing out of the hospital room as the two doctors surround Mrs. Lodge and begins to question her about her “healing skills”. Mr. Lodge is putting a hand across her back to push her towards the doctors as he is all smiles and proud of his wife. Mrs. Lodge has completely no idea and no way out as sweat forms at her forehead.
Dr. Johnson: Mrs. Lodge! You must tell us your secret cure!
Dr. Johansson: Ja! Da voiceless may speak dankes to you!
Mr. Lodge: Go on, Sweetie. Tell them! We can save lives and my pharmaceutical companies will make millions!!
Mrs. Lodge: Er…um. I need a refreshment…?
Panel one: At the Riverdale cafeteria as Betty Cooper is startled from her Archie scrapbook by Veronica who slams a Cosmo Mars Cherry soda can in front of her. Behind Veronica, Nurse Robin is helping several students who are sick to their stomachs and faces have turned green out of the cafeteria as Miss Beazley looks on with contempt. The pictures we can see in the scrap book mostly seem to be ones of Betty taking the pictures of Archie behind trees and various other objects. One picture has Archie covering up with the shower curtain as Betty is taking a picture of him.
Veronica: Here! Here’s your stupid soda!!
Panel two: Betty is examining the soda as Veronica becomes enraged to the point veins are popping in her forehead and on her clenched fists. Betty doesn’t notice as she innocently critiques the soda.
Betty: Thanks, Ronnie, but I only drink diet. And it’s warm!
Panel three: Veronica leans nose to nose with Betty as she snarls and glares at Betty as Betty begins perspire out of fear as her eyes widen and she tries to lean her head away from Veronica.
Panel four: Veronica looks on with her arms folded across her chest as she monitors Betty as Betty begins to sip the soda can as she twists her face in disgust as she doesn’t like the soda at all. In the background, two students are running away from Miss Beazley as Miss Beazley wants them to taste a stew in a long wooden spoon that has steam emitting from the stew that forms into a skull just above.
Betty thinking: Sheesh! If you can’t say anything nice, then go back to not saying anything at all!!