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It's a Wonderbread Life, Jughead Jones.

Started by PTF, April 22, 2016, 08:43:24 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

PTF

 PART I




(Jughead is watching TV as he eats a bag of chips on the couch. Next to him is Jellybean who is playing with a doll. Behind him his parents, after having gotten up from bed (as they are in sleep attire such as robes) are walking behind him. In the background we can see a bare Christmas Tree with boxes of declarations still sealed shut right next to it. The stockings are hung over the fireplace and various other Christmas decorations over the house.)

Jughead: Morning, Mom, Pops.

Mr. Jones: Well, what a surprise. I didn't expect to see you up so early.

(Mr. Jones is talking with Jughead as Mrs. Jones enters the kitchen.)

Jughead: Early for breakfast, faster to a morning nap.

(Mr. Jones turns to the Christmas tree as it is still undecorated. Hot Dog is sniffing around the boxes with candy cane decorations.)

Mr. Jones: And what about that? You promised you would decorate the Christmas tree last night...after promising to get to it all this month!

Jughead: Pops, it's just a tree we have in the house for one month and then we get rid of. Why waste time decorating if it's only going to be here for a short time?

Mr. Jones: I could use that same argument about food in the refrigerator.

(Mr. Jones glares at his son as Hotdog happily trots away with a candy cane in his mouth.)

Mr. Jones. It's December and it's a Christmas tree, Jughead.

Jughead: Then why do I always see Christmas lights up all over town in November?

(Jughead goes back to watching TV as he flips the channels as his father face palms at Jughead's lack of understanding of Christmas Spirit. Jellybean notices Hot Dog with his candy cane and licks her lips.)

Jughead: The only other holiday I might accept in November might be Halloween and only because of all the spare candy.

Mr. Jones: Please spare me...

(Mr. Jones turns as his wife screams.)

Mrs. Jones: AAAHHHH

Mr. Jones: Gladys!!

(Mr. Jones walks up to his wife who is standing and pointing into the kitchen.)

Mr. Jones: Is something wrong? Is there a fire?

Mrs. Jones: No! But our kitchen was struck by something else that consumes all in its path.

(Mr. Jones looks into the kitchen and is taken back by the sight. On the table are the remains of a feast: Chicken bones, turkey bones, ham bones, yam, pots that had food in them and empty food cans. Mrs. Jones looks into the kitchen angrily as Jughead casually walks behind them.)

Mr. Jones: !!!

Jughead: Hey, do we still have that pack of marshmallows from a month back?

(Mr. Jones turns to Jughead who pats his stomach.)

Mr. Jones: You didn't have breakfast! You ate all the preparations for our Christmas Eve Feast!

(Mr. Jones and Mrs. Jones yell at Jughead who acts calm and unfazed.)

Mr. Jones: We have relatives coming over! Even your Uncle Herman and your cousin Bingo will be here this afternoon.

Jughead: He's not bringing his girlfriend is he? She's an amazon.

(Mr. Jones points at the bare Christmas Tree as Jughead begins to rebut his father's claim. Jellybean has now crawled down and is playing with a box of tinsel as Mrs. Jones tries to get her unwrapped.)

Mr. Jones: It's like this every year with you. Don't you have any sort of Christmas Spirit in you?

(Jughead cups his hand over his mouth as he tries to think of something as Mr. Jones becomes impatient)

Jughead: Hm...not TV because I hate those lame claymation cartoons and that movie with the kid and the BB gun....

(Jughead raises a finger to symbolize he's thought of something as Mr. Jones looks on optimistically. Mrs. Jones is now wrapped up like a mummy in tinsel as Jellybean looks on and laughs.)

Jughead: One thing.

(Jughead rubs his stomach and licks his lips as he talks and his father frowns.)

Jughead: I'm one of the few people who love fruitcake.

(Mr. Jones continues to lecture Jughead as Jughead rolls his eyes.)

Mrs. Jones: Today is all about family and friends and being together!

Jughead: ...Which is just about everyday...

Mr. Jones: You would have to live your life with your eyes closed not to see that!

(Jughead Jones closes his eyes like he normally does and smiles and points at his eyes. The Jones parents begin to fume.)

Jughead: Then I guess I'm excused!

(Jughead is in his coat and scarf as he runs out of his house. Outside is several inches of snow and houses decorate for Christmas with lights and various Christmas theme decorations like Frosty the Snowman, Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, and Santa Claus.)

Mr. Jones behind him: If you're not going to be of good cheer, then stay out for a few hours while we salvage what we can and finish the decorations.

(Jughead has his hands buried in his coat pocket as he scowls as he walks along the sidewalk.)

Jughead: Hmph. What's the big deal? You can save yourself trouble and just order in food.

(Jughead stretches his arms to illustrate all the decorated houses and holiday figures in yards.)

Jughead: Christmas is just another day. The sun comes up, the sun comes down, nothing's ever different.

Jughead: I mean, why go to all the trouble with blinking multi-colored lights up and down your house. That's just a massive electricity bill for you next year.

(Jughead begins to shiver as a wave of snow blows into his face.)

Jughead: Brrrr. Not to mention how cold it is always is around this time...

(Jughead looks down the street as, unnoticed behind his back, several children are pulling a sleigh as they race off to find a hill.)

Jughead: This year is even worse with all this snow. I don't see how anyone can be happy about it being so white today.

(Jughead begins to walk back to his house.)

Jughead: Well, I think that should have given them enough time to cool down...

(Jughead walks into his yard as he prepares to peek through the living room window.)

Jughead: ...but better safe than sorry.

(Jughead looks at his house as we can see through the window. He sees his parents and Jellybean near the tree as it's almost decorated. The lights are already around the tree. Mrs. Jones is holding Jellybean as she passes Mr. Jones Christmas decorations to place on the tree. Jellybean is playing with tinsel with her free hand. Hotdog is curled up under the tree.)

Jughead: ...

(Jughead turns his head away as he sadly walks away.)

Jughead: Look at that. Not even gone a second and everyone's day just lights up.

(Mr. Jones plugs up the Christmas lights and they light up in various colors as Jellybean and Hot Dog both clap in approval. Jughead holds his stomach like he's just been punched.)

Jughead: Oh, the irony is like a hot butter knife in my bread basket...

(A high angle view as Jughead is walking down the street. We can see walking down the street towards Jughead is Trula Twyst holding a present.)

Caption: Look at that guy. There's one of these in every town. Acting like it's another day and being a grouchy with every single person he meets.

(Trula Twyst walks up to Jughead. Trula does her smile and head tilt as Jughead becomes angry and frustrated even more.)

Trula Twyst: Jughead Jones. Just the boy I was hoping to see today.

Jughead: Trula Twyst. Just the girl I was hoping not to see any day.

(Trula Twyst holds up the gift towards Jughead. Jughead looks on untrusting of the gift. Jughead has a thought balloon of himself opening the gift as a viper comes out as an evil looking Trula looks on gleefully)

Trula Twyst: Now, Juggers, is that any way to talk to someone who is delivering you your Christmas present?

(Jughead waves Trula off as he begins to walk past Trula who looks at him at a loss.)

Jughead: Pass.

Trula: Pass?

(Jughead continues to walk away from Trula as Trula becomes agitated. Her eyebrows furrow as she glares a Jughead.)

Jughead: Pass on whatever's in the box and passing by you right now.

(Jughead is hit by a snowball on the back of his head as he shudders.)

Trula off panel: Then you can have this instead!

BOP

Jughead: ACCCKKK!!

(Jughead is walking on a new street past as he tries to knock snow out of his hat. On the other corner is Ethel as she has some freshly baked cookies in a container)

Jughead: Sheesh! Is everyone going to give me a hard time today?

(Jughead meets Ethel. Ethel is happy to see him, but Jughead is less than happy to see her.)

Ethel: Juggie!

Jughead: Oh. Ethel.

(Ethel holds out the Christmas cookies as Jughead salivates over them.)

Ethel: I was just done fixing up the Christmas cookies for the Christmas Eve Party at Pop's, and I thought maybe you would like a sample.

Jughead: Keep thinking like that and Dilton has competition in the brain department!

(Jughead begins to munch the cookies in a style similar to cookie monster as Ethel looks lovingly at him even though he is making a pig out of himself.)

Caption: Look at that guy. I'd say he should eat with his mouth closed, but he'd probably bite off his own tongue...

(Jughead looks up as he continues to devour cookies fist and mouth all at once.)

Jughead: *munch munch* You say something *munch* about a Christmas Party?

Ethel: Yeah, Archie thought it up last night and the entire gang is trying to throw a quick little Christmas Eve get together for us Riverdale teens at Pop's.

(Ethel looks on lovingly as Jughead pats his belly. Ethel has her hands cupped at her left face cheek as she talks to Jughead.)

Ethel: Now, isn't there something that you would like to give me in return?

(Jughead burps in Ethel's face as Ethel's face turns green in disgust.)

Jughead: BURRRRRPPPPP

(Jughead is walking away as Ethel is bent over while waving a fist at Jughead.)

Ethel: Jughead Jones! I don't know why I bother with you sometimes!

Jughead: Think like that all the time and we're making progress.

(A high angle view again as Jughead is walking into town with The Chocklit Shoppe in view.)

Caption: Just like I thought. I'm going to have to call in the expert on this one.

PTF

PART II:

(Jughead enters Pop's as Frankie is on a ladder hanging up a Christmas banner. Jughead swings the door and the door hits the ladder as Frankie loses his balance. Jinx Malloy is on the left of the door in his standard slump, but with a slight smile on his face for once.)

Jughead: Pops! My usual feast plus whatever else you guys have!

WHAP

Frankie: Jughead! Hey! I'm trying to--

(Jughead steps forward in his muddy boots as Frankie slips as he has hold of the banner. This leads to him swinging directly into Jinx Malloy. Jughead, oblivious to what he caused, begins to look around Pop's.)

CRASSHH

Jughead: Hey, what's going on? This isn't the Pop's I know and love.

(Jughead looks around to see the inside of Pop's has been decorated for Christmas. Chuck and Nancy are at a window painting Santa Claus on the window closest to the door. Kumi Tamura and Kim Wong are mopping the floor. Nick St. Clair is reluctantly holding a ladder along with Randy, dressed in a red-green version of Tuxedo Mask, as Adam is putting up paper Christmas tree decorations on the ceilings. Wendy Weatherbee is putting green and red napkins on the tables. Archie, Betty, and Veronica (both dressed as Christmas elves) are decorating a Christmas tree that is near the counter, blocking Jughead's usual stool, Tomoko and Cricket are watching as Reggie hangs up mistletoe, Raj is filming everything being prepared, Moose is carrying a large stack of presents as Midge helps guide him towards the tree, and Dilton is frantically trying his best to supervise this late Christmas Eve party madness. Pop's is behind the counter looking at a Santa costume.)

Jughead: It's just doesn't have the same spirit like it always does.

(Jughead leaves the door open as a window blows in snow that hits the window Chuck and Nancy are working on, causing it to drip and ruin their work. On a few tables that Wendy has prepared, the napkins have blown off.)

Chuck: Hey!

Nancy: Close the door, Jughead!

Jughead: Why bother with all this once a month décor when everything was already perfect the rest of the year?


(Maria is helping Jinx and Frankie to their feet as Wendy Weatherbee closes the door as Chuck and Nancy grimace at their droopy, drippy painted Santa.)

Jinx: Sorry, Frankie. I didn't mean—

Frankie: It's not your fault.

(The victims of Jughead all glare at Jughead as Dilton walks up to Jughead. As Jughead walks in, he is leaving muddy foot prints on the floor that Kumi and Kim had just mopped, leading to both girls glaring angrily at Jughead. )

Dilton: Jughead! Sandy and Bridget went out for more provisions and we could use another hand.

Dilton: By my calculations, we should have everything ready just within--

(Jughead walks past Dilton as he heads towards Archie, Veronica, and Betty. In the background: Kumi watches in shock as Kim breaks the mop over her leg. Reggie has the mistletoe hung and is near the middle of the ladder as he bends down and points up at it to Tomoko and Cricket and puckers his lips as Cricket and Tomoko roll their eyes at him as they seem to be good sports about his wanting a kiss and Raj has his camera filming them.)

Jughead: Smells like food is ready, so that's all that's important, Dilly.

(Jughead is talking with Archie and the girls. Jughead looks disdainfully at the Christmas tree the three are decorating as it is in front of his seat. In the background, Reggie is kissed by the two girls as he smirks and winks at the camera.)

Jughead: Um, you guys do know that Christmas tree is rooted on sacred ground.

Betty: Sorry, Jughead, but this was the perfect spot.

Jughead: No. A forest is a perfect place for a tree.

Veronica: If you don't like it, you can sit somewhere else.

(Jughead folds his arms over his shoulders as he is frustrated.)

Jughead: Bah! I bet this Christmas tree is crawling with humbugs.

Archie: C'mon, Jughead. It's Christmas Time, and we just threw this party together last minute before everyone's families gather.

(Moose, carrying the presents, walks up to the gang. Behind him, Reggie is pointing the mistletoe out to Midge. Raj is on his knees filming to film an low angle view of Reggie.)

Moose: Duh, here's all the presents.

Veronica: Just sit them down and Betty can place them under the tree while I help Archie.

(Betty looks at Veronica as Veronica reluctantly gives in. Moose is walking back and sees Midge about to kiss Reggie.)

Moose: !!!

Betty: "Betty can place them under the tree while I help Archie?"

Veronica: Oh fine. I'll help with that big red one after you've gotten the others placed.

(Veronica strikes a pose towards Archie as Archie blushes. Betty rolls her eyes as she is putting gifts under the tree.)

Veronica: But it looks soooo awfully heavy. You'll help me won't, you Archiekins?

Archie: OF COURSE!!

(Jughead is just standing back talking as they arrange the presents under the tree and points at their costumes. Pops is listening in and not looking too friendly at Jughead. In the background, a pummeled Reggie is hanging on the ceiling along with the mistletoe as Moose and Midge kiss under him. Raj is lying on his back and is filming underneath Reggie)

Jughead: Look at you two. It's shameful how you dress up like that to try and win Archie over.

Betty: What?

(Jughead acts arrogant as he leans against the counter as Veronica jerks her head up.)

Jughead: I mean, Veronica. Shouldn't you be out trying to buy him over?

Veronica: That does it!!

(Veronica and Betty stand up. Veronica is pointing a finger into Jughead's chest, pushing him back.)

Veronica: For your information, needle nose, Betty and I were just helping out at the Children's Hospital and just arrived here to help set up.

(Archie is putting a ladder at the tree as he holds the star.)

Archie: Yeah! They were out spreading Christmas cheer while you were probably filling your guts.

(Jughead turns away and sticks his nose in the air.)

Jughead: "Probably"? I thought you knew me better than that, Arch.

(Archie is still angry with Jughead as Jughead doesn't seem to care one way or the other.)

Archie: We're all getting together before Christmas and everyone went out to buy gifts for friends...except you.

Jughead: Tell you what, Archie. Loan me ten dollars and whatever is left over from my eats goes to buying you a present.

(Archie and the girls go back to work as Jughead seems surprised by Archie.)

Archie: Look, just be quiet while the rest of us are working.

Jughead: You're awfully touchy today.

(Pops talking to Jughead as he lays the Santa costume on the counter. Archie is climbing on a ladder to put the star on the tree as Betty and Veronica look on lovingly.)

Pop Tate: Jughead, it wouldn't kill you to help out.

(Jughead turns to Pop and smiles as Pop looks firmly at Jughead. Archie tips over in the ladder and becomes stuck in the Christmas tree as Betty and Veronica look alarmed.)

Jughead: Maybe, but why take unnecessary chances?

(Pop Tate puts his elbows on the counter as he talks with Jughead as Jughead looks away from Pop Tate. Betty and Veronica each grab a leg as they yank Archie out of the tree. Archie is covered in tinsel, decorations and a few pine needles.)

Pop Tate: So you plan on just making one-liners, watching everyone else set the party up, and eating as much food as you can when everyone is finished?

Jughead: Almost. I planned on eating as much food as I could BEFORE everyone was finished.

(Jughead leans over the counter knocking the Santa costume off the counter.)

Jughead: You're not a saint in all of this. I mean, you must be getting a pretty penny, a dashing dime, and quant quarter or two out of this.

(Pop Tate bends down to pick up the costume as it is now dirty.)

Pop Tate: No. Everyone brought there own supplies of food and decorations and promised to clean up afterwards.

(Jughead seems confused as Pop Tate dusts off his costume.)

Pop Tate: I figure it's Christmas Time and I might not see a few of you kids for a good bit, so it's like me giving a gift.

Jughead: A gift?

(Jughead licks his lips as Pop Tate glares at Jughead.)

Jughead: That's great! You can give me food for free and save yourself the trouble of putting it on my tab!

Pop Tate: Grrrrmmmbblle.

(Pop Tate pushes Jughead out of the Chocklit Shop. All the teens who were Jughead's victims look on favorably.)

Jughead: C'mon, Pops! It's the giving season!

Pop: Right! Giving not taking!

(Pop Tate slams the door behind Jughead and Jughead reacts as if the force of the blow is vibrating throughout his body.)

Pop Tate: Give me a hint of some Merry Christmas or don't come back until New Year!

SLAMM

(Jughead takes a step away from the Shoppe.)

Jughead: I can't believe I was kicked out!  Kicked out of my home away from home while a car freshener model is rooting in my spot!

(Jughead begins to look through the windows of Pops.)

(Jughead looks on sadly as everyone seems to be enjoying each others company as they work. Moose is even helping Reggie down from the ceiling after Midge prods him with her elbow. Wendy is putting the tables back in place, Chuck and Nancy try to salvage their painted Santa, Maria, Frankie, and Jynx are straightening out the banner on the floor and dusting it off, and Kumi and Kim get a new mop to clean up the floor.)

Jughead: Look at them all. They look like they're happy without me.

(Jughead takes a step back and looks himself over.)

Jughead: I don't get it. I haven't acted any differently than I normally do—and I'm taking tongue lashing after tongue lashing to the point I can barely muster a syllable!

(Jughead shakes a fist as several people on the sidewalk turn towards him in alarm.)

Jughead: You speak the honest truth about one day and you're shunned!

(Another high angle view as Jughead is walking into the Riverdale Park)

Caption: Thanks for coming, Francis.

Other caption: Have to be somewhere. You said someone had a problem?

(Still a high angle view as Jughead is walking across a bridge and looking into the flowing icy river. Several people and kids are building snowmen and playing in the snow)

Caption: No, I said someone was a problem. Down there.

Other caption: Which one?

(Still a higher angle view, but it is now focusing on Jughead.)

Caption: That one. The one with the long nose and big ears.

Other caption: Ah, Gloomy Gus with the weird hat.

(Jughead is disheartened s he looks at his reflection in the

Caption: Actually, he's Jughead Jones, and I think he could use a little help understanding the Christmas season. 

Other caption: Leave it to a professional.

(Jughead is staring at his reflection as he sighs.)

Jughead: Look at me, all alone. Friendless, Familyless, my stomach somewhat foodless...

Jughead: Maybe everyone would be better off if I was never born. It'd probably only make their Christmas better.

(A breeze suddenly blows Jughead's hat off as he turns to catch it.)

Jughead: Hey! I don't want to be hatless much less with all the less I have that I don't!

(Jughead puts his hat on as he is taken by surprise as someone is talking to him.)

Voice behind Jughead: Funny, weren't you just preaching the, "less is more" deal?

Jughead: Huh?

(Jughead turns around to see a man with blond shoulder length hair wearing a trench coat over a red sweater, a purple scarf wrapped around his neck and regular jeans standing on the bridge beam where Jughead was.)

Francis: That's how I inferred what you were implying with the "if I was never born" talk you did a few seconds ago.

(Francis smiles down at Jughead as a snow wind blows his hair and scarf.)

Francis: Want to find out?

GingerGal

These Fanfics are great. You must be very creative. How long does it take for you to come up with an idea and then get it complete?

PTF

Part III

(Jughead is backing away from Francis.)

Jughead: Okay, I don't know how you got there or who you are—

(Francis jumps down from the beam.)

Francis: Where are my manners?

(Francis extends his hand for Jughead to shake as Jughead eyes him suspiciously.)

Francis: Name's Francis. And you're Jughead Jones. Now that we got the pleasantries out of the way...

(Jughead begins to walk off the bridge as he turns his head back to Francis.)

Jughead: ...I'll be going mine.

Jughead: I don't know who you are fella, but I'm sure you can find someone else to bother.

(Jughead turns his head forward to see Francis leaning against the bridge and looking at two children playing in the snow.)

Francis: Well, I seem to be doing just fine with you, so why ruin a good thing?

Jughead: How did you do that?

(Jughead is talking as they walk on the path of the park. Francis is pointing towards one of the children as he is making a snow angel.)

Jughead: Are you a magician?

Francis: Well, if you really want to know, my self portrait is just about finished.

(Jughead walks over to the children as the kid stands up and runs off with the other.)

Jughead: Huh?

(Jughead eyes widen as he sees the snow angel.)

Jughead: !!

(Jughead turns back towards Francis with his face twisted in disbelief.)

Jughead: Yeah. Right. If you're an angel, where are your wings? At the dry cleaners?

(Francis extends his arms as Jughead rolls his eyes.)

Francis: Oh that. See, angels really don't have wings. We just flap our arms really fast.

Jughead: ...

(Jughead walks away from Francis as Francis follows him with his eyes.)

Jughead: Am I having one horrible Christmas ever!

Francis: I don't see how anyone can have a horrible Christmas. It's a wonderful day.

(Francis is standing over the snow angel looking down at it as Jughead gloomily walks away.)

Jughead: I realize that everyone is happier without me around and now some crazy guy making bad jokes wants to be my shadow.

Jughead: Well no thanks. Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, or however you "angels" like it.

Francis: Well, either way is showing you wishing me good tidings...

(Jughead stops as Francis's demeanor changes from playful and witty to stern.)

Francis: Now, about not being born...

(Jughead turns around as Francis looks up slightly from staring at the snow angel. Jughead throws his arms in the air as he is tired of dealing with Francis.)

Jughead: Okay! Deal! You just go ahead and make me disappear.

Francis: Fine. There.

(Jughead looks at himself.)

(Jughead looks around the park as nothing seemingly has changed.)

(Jughead walks away smugly as Francis goes back to staring at the snow angel.)

Jughead: Well, looks like you need to flap your arms to work your magic, too.

Francis: You not being around doesn't increase global warming, and I said you wouldn't be born, not disappear.

Jughead: Hey, sure. Whatever works for you.

(Francis is beginning to walk away as the children, each one holding their mother's arm, towards the snow angel.)

Francis: Well, looks like the educational part of our programming is just about ready to start...

Kid one: Mommy, mommy! Look at my snow angel.

Kid two: It's real good.

(A close up on the shocked facial expressions of the kids and the mother as they are taken back by what they see.)

Mom: I'm sure you did just—

(The kids and mom look at the snow angel as it has now changed into a detailed rendition of Francis only with his angel wings. The kid who made the snow angel points at it happily as the other kid and mom are still in shock.)

Kid one: Wow! It's even better after it sets for a minute, huh?

Mom: !!!

(Jughead is walking down a street as he has his hands in his pocket as people are going in and out of buildings or going their own way with several bags of various clothes, gifts, ect.)

Jughead: Can believe that guy? Yep. I sure don't exist.

(Jughead looks into a jewelry window at his reflection and begins to make faces.)

(Jughead stops as he sees Archie and Veronica inside. They are both wearing different clothes than before. Archie is wearing a horrible ugly sweater and Veronica is even dressed more uppity than usual, she is even wearing a mink coat. Archie is struggling as he is carrying a stack of gifts. Veronica is at a counter buying a diamond and gold necklace.)

Jughead: Well, well. Looks like the Christmas festivities are over and Veronica is wrapping Archie around her claw again.

(Archie and Veronica are coming out. Veronica leads the way as she sticks her nose in the air and Archie struggles to keep the gifts from falling.)

Jughead: I'll just have to put a stop to that.

Veronica: Would you hurry up? We have five more shops to go, The Pembrooke mall, and you have to escort me to Daddykin's Christmas Party.

Archie: Sure thing Veronica...

(Jughead slaps Archie across his back. Archie is startled and confused as he drops the gifts on the snow covered sidewalk. Veronica turns around as she hears the startled Archie)

Jughead: Arch, how many times have I told you that Ronnie has servants for hard labor. Let's forgive and forget and you treat me to a burger.

Archie: Wha--?

(Veronica is yelling at Archie as Archie is trying to pick up the scattered gifts. Archie uses his free hand to point at a confused Jughead.)

Veronica: You freckled klutz! How dare you drop my valuables? I don't know why I keep you around as my boyfriend.

Archie: But, Veronica, that guy with the weird hat startled me and now he wants me to take him home and have my dad feed him or something...

(Veronica is stomping towards Jughead as Jughead looks perplexed and notices Archie's ugly sweater.)

Jughead: Hey, if you don't know that sweater is something not to be seen in public, that might explain why you don't know your bestest bud in the entire universe.

(Veronica grabs Jughead by his nose and pulls him so they are eye to eye.)

GRAB

Veronica: Understand this, commoner, my Daddykins may make me attend the doldrums that is public school, but I will most certainly not tolerate you peasants in public.

Jughead: Yow!

(Veronica throws Jughead to the ground at her feet.)

THUD

Jughead: OW!

Veronica: That's your place, now stay there!

(Veronica walks across Jughead as she sticks her nose in the air and motion with her right hand for Archie to follow. Archie has the gifts stacked up again—all be it extremely wobbly—as he follows after Veronica.)

Veronica: Archiekins, I'm walking ahead of you, I expect you to keep at last one yard behind me.

Archie: Right! Right! Coming!

Jughead: !!!

(Archie is walking around Jughead as Jughead is holding his nose. A pair of boots is walking towards the fallen Jughead.)

Jughead: Sheesh! Ronnie's had bad days before, but that was World War Three.

Person: Yeah. It's like she's a totally different person.

(Jughead is being helped to his feet by Francis.)

Jughead: Oh just wait I need.

Francis: A helping hand, indeed you do.

(Jughead dusts the snow and muck off of him as Francis looks on.)

Jughead: I don't get what got into Archie. I mean, yeah, he's whipped, but he wouldn't stand for Veronica literally walking all over me.

Francis: Maybe if he had ever met you and got to know you, but he didn't.

(Jughead waves off Francis and begins to walk away as Mrs. Grundy is walking towards them. She is carrying a small bag  and her purse.)

Jughead: Okay, I'm putting an end to that talk right here and now.

(Jughead steps in front of Miss Grundy as Miss Grundy is startled Francis leans against the jewelry store window as he seems amused by what he is seeing.)

Jughead: Miss Grundy, Merry Christmas!

Miss Grundy: Oh!

(Miss Grundy walks past Jughead as Jughead is puzzled. Francis is acting like he is looking at his manicure.)

Jughead: ?!!

(Jughead leaps in front of Miss Grundy.)

Jughead: Miss Grundy, it's me, Jughead!

Miss Grundy: Son, I'm sorry, but I can't place your face...are you new in town?

(Jughead becomes frantic as he yells at Miss Grundy and points to Francis. Miss Grundy looks where Jughead is pointing but acts as if nothing is there. Francis motions hello by raising one hand to his face.)

Jughead: It's me! Jughead! Forsythe Jones! You've been teaching me since kindergarten! Did you and the gang hire that guy to play a gag on me?

Miss Grundy: Child, I haven't seen you until today and...who are you talking about? There's no one there but your reflection.

(Miss Grundy walks away as Jughead looks back at Francis who has his hands on the back of his head as he leans his head back towards the window.)

Miss Grundy: I'm sorry, but I have Christmas shopping to get back to. If you need help or—

Jughead: No...no. I guess...you reminded me of someone....

(Jughead walks back over to Francis as Francis pushes himself off against the window.)

Jughead: Okay, how did you do that?

Francis: I'm an angel. I can do a lot of nifty things. Like make myself invisible to all but you...or pluck you out of existence at any given point in time like you pick anchovies out of a pizza.

(Jughead is beginning to talk as he looks over Francis' shoulders.)

Jughead: I don't know where the mirrors are or if you hypnotized people or—

(Jughead's hat flies straight up in the air and he leaves his feet as he is deeply shocked at seeing Francis' reflection from behind as his wings is visible in the reflection and only the reflection.)

Francis: I take it you've taken notice to the glass window. A glass window, not a mirror.

(Jughead is sitting on the ground as Francis bends down and smiles at him. Jughead nervously looks at Francis.)

Francis: Convinced?

Jughead: yep.

(Jughead is getting back to his feet as Francis steps away from the glass window and towards Jughead.)

Jughead: So, what you were saying before—about making it so that I never existed...

Francis: Yes, it's true.

(Francis is talking with Jughead as Jughead has a worried expression as he rubs his hand through the back of his head.)

Francis: You were never born, you never came to be, you were never imagined, you were never thought of, and no one on this planet now wears that hat. There's not a single person who goes by the name, title, rank, serial number, or alias of Jughead Jones.

(Jughead and Francis begin to walk up the street. Several people look confused and stare at Jughead as they are wondering who he is talking to.)

Jughead: So...how am I here talking with you?

Francis: I thought you might want to see how you friends and family are doing without you. I mean, that's why you made that wish?

(Jughead is talking as himself and Francis pass a window and only Jughead's reflection is being shown.)

Jughead: What ever happened to my wish of eating the biggest pizza ever?

Francis: Sorry, but we don't have a wide range of selection. Just angel food.

(Jughead begins to notice people staring at him and realizing everyone is thinking he's a loon. Francis rolls his eyes in mock disbelief)

Jughead: Um, Francis, is there any way you can make me invisible, too? I mean, it's supposed to be me not being born...and people are giving me funny looks.

Francis: You just want to burn your shadow away, don't you?

(Francis snaps his fingers as the passerbys wonder where Jughead suddenly disappeared to. Jughead begins to look himself over.)

SNAP

Francis: There.

Jughead: Huh.

(Francis and Jughead begin to talk as a girl walks towards them. The girl is very tall and is wearing an overly large coat with the hood up. She has a scarf that covers her lower face.)

Jughead: So, what's up with Archie and Ron?

Francis: You were never around to be Archie's best friend or to keep that roving eye of his off girls. And with Veronica, you were never around to challenge her and teach her humility with your cynical remarks and stopping her when she got to demanding.

(Jughead moves out the way of the girl's way as she hurries along.)

Francis: As it stands, Archie will do anything for Veronica and Veronica has become the biggest stuck up princess in Riverdale.

Jughead: I don't see much change with or without me.

(Francis points backwards towards the tall girl as Jughead turns back confused.)

Francis: Quite the opposite of Ethel Muggs.

Jughead: Ethel? The girl who just past by?

(Francis and Jughead look at Ethel as he hurries along and keeps her hands at her hood to make sure it doesn't slip off.)

Jughead: I know it's winter and all, but she's nearly an Eskimo.

Francis: Without you, she never gained self esteem in her looks. Now, she doesn't even want anyone to look at her in case they laugh at her.

(Jughead looks on sadly.)

Jughead: Wow. I never knew that...

(Jughead looks over at Francis who shrugs his shoulders.)

Jughead: Hey! Hold up! How did she ever consider how I treat her as a confident booster?

Francis: I'm an angel, not the all-knowing.

(Jughead and Francis continue to walk along in Riverdale and are at a shopping district. Pulling up near the sidewalk and in front of a fire hydrant is Reggie in his car. Reggie has longer hair and it is all slicked back)

Jughead: I hated to see how Reggie is.

Francis: Speaking of...

(Reggie splashes several people as he parks in front of the fire hydrant.)

SPLASSSHH

Reggie: Hah! I bet you guys weren't thinking of a wet Christmas!

(Jughead and Francis look on disdainfully as Reggie begins beeping his horn as he is combing his slick hair. The people he got wet angry walk away.)

Jughead: He's actually a bigger creep.

Francis: You were the only one who ever put him in his place. Without you stopping him, his pranks get bigger, his ego got larger and--

Reggie: C'mon! I gave you five minutes!! You spend the rest of your time with R-Man!

(Francis continues to talk as Betty runs out the store with a small bag.)

Francis: Yeah, he's a bigger creep.

Betty: I'm coming, I'm coming!

Jughead: Betty!!?

(Francis and Jughead walk towards Betty and Reggie. Betty is looking at the fire hydrant as Reggie doesn't seem to care.)

Betty: Reggie, you're not supposed to park in front of a fire hydrant. What if there was a fire.

Reggie: Babe, the only thing hot around here is me.

(Betty gets into the car as Reggie loans over to her and puts his right hand around her shoulder as she is uncomfortable. Jughead is angry as he talks with Francis)

Jughead: How can Betty just take that arrogant jerk? I mean, she was always nice, but she also stood up for herself.

Francis: Well, you know how Betty can be around Veronica when she feels insecure. You used to help her by standing up for her or pushing her. You weren't here. So she lost Archie to Veronica straight out and is stuck with Mr. Personality here.

(Reggie begins to talk as he pulls out with one hand. Betty looks sadly out her window and coincidentally at Jughead who looks on sadly.)

Reggie: Maybe I can run into my best bud/ favorite tool Archie and maybe get a look at Ronnie and whatever fine dress I know she's wearing.

Betty: Sigh.

(Jughead is shaking with rage as he has his back to Francis who calmly talks to him.)

Francis: So what do you think of this Brave New World?

(Jughead turns to Francis and points a finger at him.)

Jughead: I think you're worse than all three ghosts of Christmas combined and squared!

(Francis begins to walk and motions for Jughead to follow as Jughead looks away guiltily.)

Francis: Don't blame me. This is all your doing.

Jughead: Don't remind me...

(Jughead and Francis pass a coffee shop. Inside we can see Trula Twyst reading a book.)

(Jughead stops as he begins to shiver as Francis notices his reaction.)

Francis: So it's all hitting you at once.

Jughead: No. This involuntary reaction to an evil presence I've had since the first moment I met...

(Jughead jumps back towards Francis as he notices Trula Twyst in the coffee shop.)

Jughead: TRULA TWYST!!

Francis: Relax. She can't see you and you don't exist.

(Trula suddenly looks up as if she sees something. This causes both Jughead and Francis to jump back a step.)

Jughead and Francis: ?!!

(Trula goes back to reading her book as Jughead has his hand over his heart and Francis is feeling his left arm over.)

Francis: Wow. She actually gave me goosebumps.

Jughead: Hey, you be that psychopath's lab rat and goosebumps are a good day.

(Jughead looks back at Trula Twyst with a smirk. Francis rolls up his sleeves as he casually answers Jughead.)

Jughead: So who's the poor sap she's trying to wrap her claws around now that "Juggers" isn't around?

Francis: No one. She doesn't talk, interact, or have a friend in the world. She's just about as invisible as you and me.

(Jughead turns to Francis.)

Jughead: Oh c'mon! I don't believe that.

Francis: Apparently her main interest has been you and without that to motivate her to get out and meet people...

(Francis walks away as Jughead shows fake bravado.)

Francis: ...well, she's existing, but not living. I can't think of much else worse than that.

Jughead: Yeah, well, when you're social network consists of surveying people all about me and using that info to break me down, then maybe she—

(Jughead looks back at the window as Trula Twyst looks at a boyfriend and a girlfriend talking and enjoying each others company.)

(Trula Twyst begins to cry as Jughead looks on greatly troubled. We can see the book  she was reading is titled: HOW TO MAKE CONNECTIONS)

(Francis is waiting up for Jughead to catch up. Jughead is slowly catching up as he looks back.)

Francis: You were saying something?

Jughead: I—I was just thinking how all of this walking has worked up my appetite.

(Jughead is walking along side Francis as they are on the street leading to Chocklit Shoppe. Jughead cheers up.)

Jughead: And hey! We're almost at my home away from home!

(Jughead begins to run ahead as he salivates. Francis tries to call him back, but Jughead runs ahead.)

Jughead: Pop Tate's Chocklit Shoppe is right around this corner!

Francis: Um, you might not want to rush into things right now—

(Jughead looks back at Francis as he turns the street corner.)

Jughead: Hey, I might be invisible and not exist, but Pop Tate's Chocolate malt is as plain as the nose on me—

(Jughead has an expression of sheer horror as he looks ahead.)

Jughead: !!!

(Jughead is beginning to fall on to his knees as Francis approaches him._

Jughead: You maniacs. You did it! You actually did it!!

(Jughead is on his knees as he has his fist raised to the sky and his head titled upward as he screams. Jughead is in front of a closed down, badly battered by weather and old age Chocklit Shoppe. Garbage is all around the Shoppe. The windows of the Shoppe are cracked or broken and the door is boarded up.)

Jughead: BLAST YOU! BLAST YOU ALL TO BLAZES!!!

(Francis is beside Jughead as a grief ridden Jughead sobs.)

Jughead: My no service must have lead to this horrible tragedy.

Francis: What are you talking about? You never paid and if I ever turned paper to stone and cement, I could build an actual stairway to heaven with your IOUs

(Jughead turns sadly to Francis as Francis seems sorry for what he said.)

Jughead: Sniff Sniff

Francis: Don't be like that. Allow me to quote a local philosopher: "The sun comes up, the sun comes down. Nothing's ever different.

(Jughead begins to run away as Francis looks on.)

Jughead: I can't—I can't take anymore! This is a nightmare! A nightmare!

Francis: Sheesh. One step forward, two steps back and a hop and skip to the side.

(Francis looks up and smiles.)

Caption: Francis, not to pry, but I think you might want to be more direct with the life lesson or you might just—

Francis: Hey, this kid is a hard nut to crack. Don't worry, from what you've told about him, I think after this next bit he'll understand it all perfectly.

(Jughead is running along his street towards his home.)

Jughead: I can't believe this! I mean, my friends...my archenemy...Pop Tate's! What else can there be!?

(Jughead stops to where his house is only to find a much larger house, more extravagant house decorated for Christmas. Even the mail box is fancier and has "Jones" written on it.)

Jughead: Is this my home?! It looks completely different.

(Francis is suddenly behind Jughead as Jughead is surprised.)

Francis: Want me to fill you in?

Jughead: !!!

(Jughead adjusts his hat as he sneers at Francis as Francis shrugs his shoulder.)

Jughead: Someone should put a bell on you.

(Francis begins to talk as Jughead and Francis walk to the door.)

Jughead: How did my parents afford this house?

Francis: You were never their son, so they had plenty of money when you take out your snacks, your grocery lists, pizza delivery—

(Jughead motions with one hand for Francis to be quiet as he opens the door.)

Jughead: I get it, I get it!

(Jughead begins to go inside.)

Jughead: And thanks for conforming how much better off my parents are without me! Able to afford a nice home and—

(Jughead and Francis are in the living room as it is empty. A Christmas tree is in the corner, but not gifts and stockings are left unfilled. I looks like no one has been home for days.)

Jughead: --Not being here on Christmas.

(Jughead turns to Francis and motions with both hands.)

Jughead: Where is everyone? It's Christmas.

Francis: Before I was rudely interrupted...

(Francis is talking as Jughead begins to look at the ground.)

Francis: Your parents never had kids, so your mom never stayed home to raise you and stayed at her old/current job. Your dad got promoted and is out of town, and your mom is as dedicated to her job as she was to raising you and...

(Francis eyes Jughead as Jughead is lifting up the sofa cushion.)

Francis: I'm sorry. Is my elucidation boring you?

(Jughead is scratching his head as he looks confused.)

Jughead: I can listen and look for Hot Dog's food bowl and dog treats. I mean, if my parents are away then they must have someone looking on him to—

(Francis is explaining to Jughead as he Francis is the most serious he has ever been.)

Francis: Hot Dog was your dog.

Jughead: He's the family dog! Even without me, there's Pops, Mom, and Jelly—

(Jughead has a look of fright as his eyes begin to water up.)

(Jughead rushes upstairs frantically as Francis looks on patiently with great concern.)

Jughead: Jellybean! Jellybean!!

(Jughead runs to where Jellybean's room is. It is not decorated and is just a plain door.)

Jughead: C'mon! I know you're at my Aunt Louise while my parents are away! I know that when I open this door I'll—

(Jughead opens the door to see a work office and Francis in the middle of the room.)

Francis: You're father's work office.

(Jughead slides down against the wall until he is sitting on the floor. Jughead is in deep shock and a tear is rolling down his left cheek. Francis is beginning to sit next to him.)

Francis: Your parents loved you. They loved being parents. They wanted to have another child, and they wanted you have a sibling.

(Jughead is looking straight ahead as he tilts his head up to try and hold back his tears. Francis is sitting down beside him is also looking straight ahead.)

Jughead: I get it. No me. No Jellybean.

(Jughead turns to Francis.)

Jughead: I guess I mattered a lot to my friends, family, and community. And I guess you could say that about anyone.

Francis: You could.

(Jughead tilts his head downward as he shamefully thinks about how he had been acting.)

Jughead: And I must have really screwed up both ways if you had to come down, huh?

Francis: Well, we're always here, but yeah. With you I had to be a tad more direct and creative.

(Jughead begins to feebly smile at Francis.)

Jughead: I didn't really appreciate that. Even on Christmas Eve, I just went though the motions.

Jughead: And that's the one day I should. I mean, every one else did with being together, offering gifts, being friendly...

(Francis claps his hands and begins to stand up.)

CLAP

Francis: And you got it!

Jughead: ??

(Francis is talking with Jughead as Jughead begins to stand up.)

Francis:  Everyone is important to someone. Everyone you make your friend, your archenemy or favorite food pad becomes part of your string and it all gets woven into a much larger tapestry.

(Francis smiles at Jughead who is listening intensely.)

Francis: And there's this one certain day when you should really look at that tapestry and come to appreciate that day for all you give people and all the people you have ever know have given to you.

(Francis elbows Jughead who looks away as he smiles sheepishly.)

Francis: Some gifts don't involve fancy wrappings...

Jughead: I...t's what we do for other people.

(Francis begins to walk out of the room as Jughead calls him back.)

Francis: Can't say it any better, so I'll just be on my way.

Jughead: Wait!

(Francis playfully rolls his eyes towards Jughead as he doesn't turn his body. Jughead is has his hands behind his back and the top of his left shoe on his right heel as he desperately, but nervously wants to make a request.)

Francis: Something else?

Jughead: Well, I was thinking...you know, I know how good my life was and I did learn my lesson so...

(Francis is at the door frame and Jughead closes his eyes tightly.)

Francis: Close your eyes.

(Jughead opens them.)

(Jughead looks around to see that is in the park.)

Jughead: ...

(Jughead shouts in joy as he startles everyone in the park.)

Jughead: I'M BACK! IT'S CHRISTMAS! IT'S MY RIVERDALE FILLED WITH THE  FRIENDS, PLACES, AND FAMILY I LOVE!!!

(Jughead runs out of Riverdale Park as people look on.)

Jughead: Merry Christmas, Pickens Park.

(Jughead is running past Riverdale High.)

Jughead: Merry Christmas, Riverdale High!

(Jughead is running past the Main Riverdale Library.)

Jughead: Merry Christmas, Main Riverdale Library!

(Jughead is running along The Local Riverdale Library.)

Jughead: Merry—

(Jughead stops as he scratches his head at having a Main and Local library.)

(Jughead yells at the Local Riverdale Library.)

Jughead: I don't know why you're here, but you're part of Riverdale, so Merry Christmas, Local Riverdale Library!

(Jughead is at The Chocklit Shoppe and opens the door wide open as everyone is eating and talking with one another at the Christmas party. Trula Twyst has her gift, Ethel is in the room just under the Christmas Tree, Reggie is standing around, and Archie is with Betty and Veronica near the tree.)

Jughead: My beloved friends! I cherish you more than a double decker Big Pop!!

(Jughead runs up to Reggie as Reggie has one brow raised and his left lip curled as he is confused.)

Jughead: Reggie! Are you still the same arrogant jerk you have always been?

Reggie: Um, I guess...

(Jughead hugs Reggie extremely hard as Reggie's face turns purple and his body.)

Jughead: Merry Christmas, Reggie!!

(Jughead runs towards Dilton as Dilton is taken back by Jughead's suddenly positive attitude. Several of the other teens look on confused. Cricket is checking out a passed out Reggie.)

Jughead: Dilton, we plan a Christmas eve party, you tell me in November and I'll get right at it!

(Jughead runs up to Ethel as Ethel acts sheepish. Jughead pulls at his shirt.)

Ethel: Juggie, I've never seen you so...so full of Christmas cheer.

Jughead: This is how everyone should be. Celebrating the people and places you make a part of your life.

(Ethel looks up at the mistletoe above her head as Jughead playfully rolls his eyes.)

Ethel: I'm glad to hear. And look, there's mistletoe and the old Christmas tradition..

(Jughead kisses Ethel on the cheek as Ethel's body stiffens and her eyes turn to hearts.)

Jughead: Merry Christmas, Ethel.

(Ethel faints as Moose and Adam catch her. Trula is walking up to Jughead. She is still carrying her gift.)

Trula: Jughead, I've never seen you so happy and with such an open positive outlook.

(Trula tilts her head and smiles as Jughead looks at the reader with a smirk.)

Trula: Have you gone insane?

(Jughead takes Trula's gift.)

Jughead: This is for me, from earlier, right?

Trula: Yes, I thought that...

(Jughead looks inside to see a brand new hat just like his own, but in mint condition.)

Jughead: !!!

(Jughead looks at it as Trula turns away as she blushes.)

Jughead: Wow! I thought that my hat was the last of its line.

Trula: Well...as much as I've burnt you up, I thought your hat had too many scorch marks on it and a new one might be...

(Jughead puts his old hat on Trula who is taken by surprise as he puts the new one on his head.)

Jughead: Merry Christmas, Trula! And here, I know it's hand-me-down, but hey, you want inside of my head, you can start by analyzing my hat!

Trula: !?

(Jughead is walking towards Archie, Betty, and Veronica with his arms extended as he prepares to give them a big hug. In the back ground, Trula is placing the hat on her head.)

Jughead: Veronica, rich, but tolerable; Betty, nice, but strong; and Archie Andrews, the best friend a guy could ever have!

(Jughead begins to hug all three at once. In the background Trula is holding her stomach like its demanding food and walking up to her is Tomoko carrying a tray of chocolate fudge treats.)

(Archie is talking with Jughead as Jughead stops hugging the trio. In the background, Trula begins to scarf down the fudge treats uncontrollably as Tomoko looks on in awe.)

Archie: Wow. I never thought I would see the day Jughead Jones was full of cheer and not just food.

(Jughead walks towards Pops, who is dressed like Santa, as he talks to Archie. Betty and Veronica look at Jughead perplexedly.)

Jughead: Hey, it may only come once a year, so mark it down, Arch.

Pop Tate: Jughead, something you want to say to me?

(Jughead is talking with Pop as Pop motions with one hand for him to stop.)

Jughead: Pop, I know I'm a bum and a glutton, and I don't have the money, but I promise I'll do a better job.

Pop Tate: Pop? Why I'm Santa Claus and you've been all that, but you're still a good boy...

(Pop Tate pulls down the white beard and smiles at Jughead. Jughead winks and gives him the okay hand signal.)

Pop Tate: ...So let's hold off until the new year and enjoy the holiday.

Jughead: Right on.

(Jughead is leaving and waving goodbye to everyone.)

Jughead: Bye, everyone and in case I don't catch you before the 25th—MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

(Jughead leaves as nearly everyone stares expressionlessly at the door. Trula Twyst is continuing to eat various types of treats and Sandy is using a red napkin to try and wake up a still out of it Ethel. Reggie is trying to work a crick out of his back.)

(Veronica leans behind Archie's back to Betty who cups her hand over the left side of her mouth as if only to talk so Veronica can hear her.)

Veronica: Betty, you don't think Jughead got into your dad's eggnog, do you?

Betty: I think I'm just going to consider this a Christmas miracle and leave it at that.

(From the window of the Jones home we can see The Jones and Wilkin family enjoying Christmas dinner as Uncle Herman throws a turkey drumstick to Jughead who catches it as he talks with Bingo. The adults are talking with one another)

Caption: I have to admit, Francis you do good work.

Caption: Well, the foundation was already set for me, I just put up a few bright lights is all.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

PTF

Quote from: GingerGal on April 22, 2016, 09:03:10 PM
These Fanfics are great. You must be very creative. How long does it take for you to come up with an idea and then get it complete?

Well, this is an old one. A lot of them I did when I was staying up all night with my mom or just because I had no money so I had to entertain myself. Like this one is based on It's a Wonderful Life. Thought it would be fun.

Normally, it's idea, frame it out in my head, write the first page, write the last, middle. Longer ones I map out more.

GingerGal

Quote from: PTF on April 22, 2016, 09:13:36 PM
Quote from: GingerGal on April 22, 2016, 09:03:10 PM
These Fanfics are great. You must be very creative. How long does it take for you to come up with an idea and then get it complete?

Well, this is an old one. A lot of them I did when I was staying up all night with my mom or just because I had no money so I had to entertain myself. Like this one is based on It's a Wonderful Life. Thought it would be fun.

Normally, it's idea, frame it out in my head, write the first page, write the last, middle. Longer ones I map out more.
Really good stuff and really creative. My mind doesn't really work like that. I can come up with ideas in my head, but when it comes to writing them down on paper they all get mixed up and don't make sense anymore.

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