Okay, found all my flash drives with all the fan fics...save that I wasn't smart enough to title them better. Yeesh. Anyway, starting tomorrow, I'll post more and more as I sort out them all out.

I also found some other fan fics I didn't post because I forgot or I never finished. If anyone wants I can let you look at them, I just can't promise quality...so you know about the same as the regular stories.

Anyway, here's the first one I posted, so enjoy.




JUGHEAD'S GUIDE TO GIRLS.

Jughead's Guide To Girls

(Jughead is talking to the reader as he is just entering Pop's.)

Jughead: Hello, it's me, your friend, Forsythe "Jughead" Jones, and I've come to clear out a few misconceptions.

(Jughead is walking as no one at their seats notice him and are eating or conversing normally. Eating are several couples of anonymous students)

Jughead: I've heard the whispers about how you don't understand how I can't be interested in girls. Like I hate girls.

(Jughead is eating a burger at the counter, leaning against it casually as Pop Tate is angry and holding up a long sheet of paper titled JUGHEAD'S TAB $$$. The Tab seems to extend for miles.)

Jughead: I don't hate girls. What I hate is how girls make guys do stupid things or put them in horrible situations.

(Jughead is motioning with his hand towards Midge sitting alone at a table as Reggie is hitting on her as she seems uninterested.)

Jughead: Well, let me give you my view on girls. Starting with...

(Reggie is talking to Midge, who is rolling her eyes in disinterest as Moose stomps towards Reggie without him noticing.)

Caption: The Taken Girl.

Caption: This is the girl who is steady with a boyfriend. Most would avoid this girl because of an overprotective boyfriend, but there are those who just...

(Reggie is looking nervously at Moose who is cracking his knuckles as Midge looks on happily.)

POW

(Moose punches Reggie across the room as Jughead has to leap over the rocketing Reggie.)

Jughead: Well, a picture is worth a thousand words.

(Jughead is over at an unconscious and badly battered Reggie as he lies in a slump against a wall. Jughead motions at Reggie with both arms to showcase his point.)

Jughead: Period.

(Once again, no one notices Jughead. Jughead is now in a fancy restaurant—he is wearing the same clothes only with a tie over his sweater—as he is just beside Archie and Veronica. Archie and Veronica seem to be having a good time after their meal. A waiter comes carrying the bill in a tray)

Caption: The Rich Girl

Jughead: You would think this would be great for any guy: beautiful, money, fun to be around...

(The Waiter places the tray down as Archie looks over the check.)

(Archie looks at the bill for three hundred dollars as his eyes go wide.)

Archie: !!!

(Archie is sweating profusely and has his shoulders hunched and showing his empty hands as the waiter and Veronica glare at him.)

(Archie is now in the kitchen washing dishes as Jughead looks on, shaking his head in disapproval. Archie has several broken dishes and cups at his feet as he angrily works. Through an open door we can see several other guys around Veronica.

Crrassh krrrrinkkkk

Jughead: Trust me. When you factor in economic status times recession, it just doesn't equal happiness.

(Jughead is in Betty Cooper's backyard as Betty is raking leaves. Betty doesn't notice him. Jughead looks on approvingly)

Caption: The Girl Next Door.

Jughead: She's kind, hard working, and she knows you better than anyone else. She's someone you can depend on.

(Betty is walking into the kitchen from the backyard as Jughead follows. On the kitchen counter is a tray of cookies and he grabs one and begins to eat as he follows Betty.)

Jughead: And she can cook!

(Betty is going upstairs as Jughead casually follows.)

Jughead: Seems like this type of girl has no flaws...

(Inside Betty's room as she is looking at several pictures of Archie as she lies on her bed. Several pictures of Archie are on the wall and the bed spread is a picture of Archie's face. Jughead is leaning against door frame and is pointing towards Betty's room with his thumb.)

Jughead: Until you realize how obsessive they are.

(Now we are at school as Chuck is drawing a bowl of fruit on a table as Nancy is getting angry with him and pointing at her watch.)

Caption: The Demanding Girl.

Jughead: She has wants and she needs you to hear about it.

(Jughead is right beside Nancy as Nancy has a list of things she wanted to do today. Chuck is not noticing Nancy as he continues to work.)

Jughead: Now wanting you to listen to her, spend time with her, and follow her interests may seem like not a big deal—

(An impressed Jughead is looking over Chuck's drawing as Chuck is using his thumb to get a better angle of the bowl.)

Jughead: --but wouldn't we all rather do what we wanted and not have anyone bother us about it?

(Jughead is walking down the street as he is talking to the reader.)

Jughead: Only two more to go and they are by far the worse. Pay close attention.

(Jughead is walking on a sidewalk past several buildings as the talks to the reader. Several people pass him by without noticing him.)

Jughead: There is one girl who will never take no for an answer. She will hound you and run you down unless you have some shoes have amazing tread.

(Jughead turns as he hears his name called.)

Jughead: I call this one--

Ethel off-panel: JUGGIE!!!

(Jughead is running away from Ethel as Ethel is closing in on him with her arms spread ready to grab him.)

Caption: The You're-The-Only-One-For-Me Girl

Ethel: I'm going to catch you, lover boy!

(Ethel has lost Jughead as Jughead is looking from a library in the background. Ethel is scratching her head as she looks around.)

Jughead: swhhooo.

(Jughead is in a library next to Trula Twyst. Trula is sitting at a desk with several piles of books at her left, paper and pen at her front and a protractor at the edge of the table.

Caption: The Femme Fatal.

Jughead: And to our most dangerous type of girl.

(Jughead is talking as Trula actually turns to him. Jughead is talking straight ahead to the reader.)

Jughead: Superman has kryptonite, fire has water, and Archie has child proof caps.

(Jughead is talking as Trula seems to be listening intently. We can see on the desk the paper as it is a picture of Jughead and his brain.)

Jughead:  She just knows what buttons to press.

(Jughead is talking as Trula does her glance and shrug.)

Jughead: Be it a glance or a shrug...

(Jughead quickly turns but Trula is back reading a book.)

SWISH

(Jughead is cautiously turning away form Trula as Trula looks up slightly.)

Jughead: Anyway, unlike the previous girl who tries to tire your body out, this one tries to break your will.

(Jughead goes back talking to the reader as Trula begins to watch Jughead again.)

Jughead: Her method of choice is to manipulate you with her plots and schemes, so you have to always be on your guard.

(Trula is sticking her tongue out at Jughead as catches it from the corner of her eye.)

Jughead: The best advice I can give is...

(Jughead catches Trula just from the corner of his eyes as Trula smiles deviously.)

(Jughead leans over to get nose to nose with Trula who just smiles back.)

Jughead: Never turn your back on her.

(Jughead is entering his home as he looks back to talk to the reader.)

Jughead: Now, I know some of you may think I'm only looking at the most extreme cases, the other end of the spectrum, not focusing on the larger demographic. But trust me on this--

(Jughead is in the living room as Jellybean, Miss Grundy, and his mom is waiting for him. Jellybean is walking towards Jughead and reaching out for Jughead to pick her up.)

Jellybean: Big brother!

Mrs. Jones: Jughead, Miss Grundy was in the neighborhood and was kind enough to stop by to check on you.

Miss Grundy: I was just finishing telling your mom how well you have done with your assignments and exams.

(Jughead bends down to pick up Jellybean.)

Jughead: Okay, I admit it...

(Jughead is being hugged by Jellybean around his neck as Miss Grundy and Mrs. Jones looks on satisfactorily.)

Jughead: Not all young ladies are bad.

THE END

Wait. Predator vs Archie verse Ginger Lopez who not only left her friends to die, but was extremely snotty about it.

How can I forget? Nick St. Clair the baddest of the bad.

I can see the logic in thinking a TV show will help with comic sales. When I was a kid I bought TMNT Adventures because I watched the cartoon, same with Ghostbusters, Beetlejuice, and even Captain Planet.

...Of course the way the Archie reboot is and the way the pilot for the TV show has been described, it kind of reminds me when my mom got me The Toxic Avenger movie because she knew I liked The Toxic Crusader cartoon. Kind of a whole world of difference.

Probably Fred Mirth just because of the scale of what he did.

PTF Reviews Jughead #4

Avaste ye, mateys, 'tis—

Y'know, I just want to get this over with.

Jughead's back in school, dodgeball, pirate fantasy, hacking, cliffhanger. There, all good!


The Good: The humor. This has been the one constant saving grace for this series. Jughead is still witty. Heck, again, Kevin Keller actually got me to chuckle. I mean, we keep this pace up for Keller and I'll have to use both hands to count all the times he wasn't boring to me. And I like how well Jughead knows Archie will get into trouble once left alone. I also like crownie because I had the exact same thoughts going through my head while reading this issue.


Jughead's plan: I like that how well worked out it was, Jughead's cool head and Dilton being a nervous wreck. It goes to show how clever Jughead is. Even had a few back up plans. I also like that his friends aren't stupid and realize that Stanger is up to something. Characters using logic and deductive reasoning...these characters can survive a few horror movies. And we do get a pretty cool cliffhanger now that Stanger knows Jughead hacked his computer.

The art: The pirate garb looks great. I like the constant different clothing for the characters. The pirate ship looks cool.  Jughead looked consistent. Betty looked good until that very last page. The coloring was amazing still.

Pirates: If you like pirates, you'll like this issue.

The bad.

The dream: Like I've said, I'm okay with the flashbacks or daydreams, they're good throwbacks to the olden days and looks like people here like them, but I still believe they need to have a message or lesson that connect to the main storyline. This one didn't do that. Yeah, Pirate Jughead has Pirate Dilton help him? You're telling me he wouldn't have come up with that idea without it? I can honestly say, you can skip these pages and not miss a thing. It doesn't hurt the main plotline at all because it doesn't contribute anything to it. Actually...it's kind of funnier without it. You go from Jughead closing his eyes waiting to be pelted by dodgeballs...to him lying on the ground with a dodgeball near his head. Seriously, someone else who bought this issue try it and tell me what you think.

The art: You know by now. And it gets worse with character not highly detailed but some have little dot for eyes, some don't, some have lines for mouth, some don't. Is it so hard to put in that extra dot or line like you did with the others that are standing right next to that person?  There's one panel where Jughead doesn't even look completed. Outlines and lines are missing. And Betty's chin at the end, by heavens.

What I've learned.

1.   Kevin Keller's dating options are limited.
2.   Chuck ISN'T the only African America student in Riverdale High.
3.   Dodgeballs hurt.
4.   Crownie's got the right idea.
5.   Jughead is really messed up in the head.
6.   Moose can say more than one word at a time.
7.   Jughead just had Reggie get brutally beaten...Jughead is a monster!
8.   I miss Fernando Ruiz
9.   Veronica is underutilized in this comic.
10.   Anonymous Jughead and Dilton are not.



Okay, this issue was brutal. I'm not lying. I didn't like it. The art just isn't good. And I've actually seen previews of Unbeatable Squirrel Girl and they look really, really good. I'm not lying. That art would be great here—but then today I checked out a recent preview and...I think two books is asking too much from her. It's tough for any artist. Erik Larsen tried it with Savage Dragon and Thor and both books too a massive hit in quality. But I have to go by what I've seen and I don't like it after the first issue.

As far as the writing goes, this is probably the worse the 4 because...like I said, I can take the dream sequence out and not miss anything. It didn't connect to the main plot, so it came across to me as filler or padding. Now if this was put at the end as a special or extra separate story, great.  I'm fine with it, but it doesn't work as a narrative tool for the plot.

But the humor (save for when Jughead explained the Slackbeard joke) was still very good. But the art needs to improve and the dream sequences need to connect better with the main story. I see glimmers of potential, but it needs some fanning.

I'll give this issue a D.

PTF Reviews Jughead #3

The Good.

Mr. Jones: Well, we see where Jughead gets his wits and smart thinking from. He comes across as really clever and quick on his feet. I love how he was able to manipulate his son back into Riverdale High and the bit of personality he has with not being able to remember Betty's name so friendly and casually.

The war continues: Jughead vs. Stanger continues to heat up. Jughead and his encounter with him this issue was great. Jughead letting Hot Dog use the bathroom on school grounds and "I can't enter school grounds to clean it up" was great. The tension between the two is building. Jughead is the rock in the ocean that refuses to be covered by the tide. Plus Archie having to clean up the mess was both funny and a great jerk move at the same time.

R.I.V.E.R.D.A.L.E.: I'm not really a fan of the old time stories (ironically I consider Man from R.I.V.E.R.D.A.L.E. by DeFalco and Ruiz my favorite Archie story so go figure.) So if you're into the spy stuff and lots of dots after every letter in a name, you should be happy. So if you're unlike me and a diehard fan, you probably enjoyed it much more than me (See Bad for more details.) It has action and humor that did make me laugh a few times.


Good Art: The opening page was fun. Mr. Jones talking with Betty/Barbara/Beth was the best Betty has looked in the series thus far. Archie breaking the drone and Veronica being a spoiled brat had very good body language. And again the coloring (especially during the intro to the dream) was really good. And I remember hearing how people didn't like Mrs. Jones dressing like a teenager; I don't have a problem with it. Gives her a bit of personality to me.

The bad:


The dream sequence. Okay, I normally like them, because they are really fun and they help Jughead with the lesson he needs to learn to overcome the problem he is facing this issue. Not this one. You could have easily had Jughead realize and connect the dots and still come to the same outlandish conclusion without it. Or hey, maybe Pop Tate can talk with him a bit. Y'know a meaningful conversation. And again...I think Reggie's the victim here. I haven't read the new Archie (probably next month), but he hasn't done anything wrong to deserve to be the butt monkey in Jughead's dreams. And again, the dream sequences take up pages where he could be a jerk, where he could be an antagonist. Hey, maybe he could have been a stooge for Principal Stanger. That would be justification. And like I said, if the funny and message work for the story, I'm willing to over look it. Not for this one. This one didn't work for me.

The art. Yeah, yeah. The usual. Also you add in Jughead is pretty much in eyes always open mode, which I don't like and...the eyes getting weirder and weirder as the issues go. And a few characters in panels look like they have broken noses. Example just look at Stanger in his meeting with Mr. Jones; the last panel. The bridge of his nose is broke. And Pop looks different from the last issue, but then again, who in this comic looks the same for more than a panel or two?

What I learned.

1.   Drone 101 is a thing in high schools.
2.   All heroic secret HQs are stationed in the most humblest of places.
3.   Reggie is the victim, Jughead IS the bully.
4.   Mr. Jones is a smooth operator.
5.   Chuck might be the only African America student in Riverdale High
6.   Mr. Jones is bad with names.
7.   Imagination can make the hours pass by.
8.   Why work hard when your dad is rich?
9.   Riverdale High: Future home of the super soldiers.
10.    Ice guns rule.

We have good stuff like the Jones clan vs. Stanger and the humor is still great, but I didn't like the dream sequence because it didn't really serve a point; no lesson or message that the character couldn't have deduced without it, so it felt like it took up pages that could be used for...I dunno...THE PLOT. And the art...yeah, I get the complaints now, but this is the best Betty so there is that. I'll go C on this one.

So tomorrow will be issue four. And judging by the cover pirate stuff. And yes, chances are I will be doing a horrible pirate accent. Because it's fun.

JUGHEAD ISSUE TWO

Continuing with my reviewing of the reboot of Jughead.

Jughead has always known how to bend the rules to get out of my things in life, but with new Phys Ed Teacher Coach Eng, he might bend until he breaks. Can a visitor from the future inspire Jughead or will it be detention forever for our hero?


The Good

The writing. Hey, Chip Zdarsky wrote a Time Police story I like. And this is how, in the old book, January and Jughead's relationship should have been; Jughead still not wanting to date or falling in love. And the humor is still great and I like that you have a hero who has to use his brains to thwart the villains. This one is mainly Coach Eng. He's just a massive bully who loves giving detention. The humor is still on point. Heck, Kevin Keller actually showed a bit of a personality. And I do think some elements of the story are rushed (see bad below) it does clearly communicate what is going on: Stanger is a dictator, who is making everyone miserable with his brigade of new teachers, and Jughead has been make it difficult for him.

The dream sequences. Like I said, I like a Time Police related story. And again it related to the main problem Jughead is facing with Coach Eng: His method of bending the rules is not working. And in the end. He learns using prep time. Heck, I just appreciate intelligent use of time travel and showing it in a way that won't confuse the reader (really smart idea to do the chalk and diagram). And again, Reggie is the bad guy, so if you like seeing Reggie get his, you'll be happy.

The good parts of the art and coloring. I'm not happy with the art on this issue. But there are a few good sequences. Mainly the last few pages with Jughead with Jughead using prep time to cruise through the course. I love the entire red panel of Coach Eng as he looks like he's going to explode and the coloring and shading for the last two pages fit the mood nicely.

The cliffhanger: I actually debated putting this in the bad because we went from gym shenanigans, day dreams about time police and an evil nickel thief to...a knife in school? Eee. I mean, that's pretty serious in today's world. But I do like to see where this is going and it was drawn well and the coloring was great. So I'm going more good than bad.

Hey Pop Tate: You exist! Now we just need conformation on Jughead's parents, Jellybean, Trula Twyst, Ethel, Toni Topaz, Jeff Shultz...




The Bad.

The art: Okay, now I'm beginning to see what everyone's problem with Erica Henderson's work is. The characters do not stay on model. Their heads and noses and bodies keep changing.  January McAndrews is hit hard with this as he chin and head keep changing over and over, panel after panel during the fight with Rex Mantlor's minions. And Betty's index finger on one page is really weird. I know that's nickpicky...but I'm a penny pincher so this stuff matters to me; I want to feel that I spent my money wisely. I also had some trouble telling what was going on in the fight sequences in the daydream. Those were lasers? That was a magnet? This art...I'll be nice and say I can tell who everyone is, so that is an improvement over the first issue, but everything else got worse. And you have a character named "Flutesnoot" and you don't give him a long nose? I mean, his name is "Flutesnoot", that's a gimme! Sum up, the art is not good.

What is it with this book and freckles??: Okay, Archie doesn't have any at all this issue. Weird, but it's consistent. Then January shows up and has freckles...and then never again. It's little things like this that get really annoying.

Maybe slow down a bit. Okay, I've said I like the writing, but I feel that the events of the main conflict are being glossed over. Like the new teachers who are just giving detention for breathing too hard. I could be fine with that...if we didn't have the end where Principal Stanger comments on how the teachers are calling him "Smughead" and how he keeps getting in their way. Shouldn't we have seen Jughead dealing with more of the strict, Stanger approved teachers so that we can see the conflict escalate between the protagonist and the antagonist? And I think that's the downside of doing fantasy
sequences. I like them, but are they necessary? Not really. You can do without them. And they are taking space and time from the main storyline. I mean, I like them thus far, but it is starting to become a double edge sword to me. Like I think Reggie being the butt of Jughead's subconscious is funny...but does he really come across that badly because of how little talk or panel time he gets?

Reggie: Maybe I need to read the Archie series, but Reggie hasn't done anything in this book to deserve Jughead's abuse of him in his fantasies and dreams. I mean, Jughead made fun of him in this issue and Reggie retorted. That's it. Like I said, I know Reggie from the classic stories is a jerk, but would new readers?


What I learned:

1.   Appreciate the letter E for as long as we have it.
2.   You can get detention for failure.
3.   Time traveling involves funny hats
4.   Freckles come and freckles go
5.   Apparently using a skate board and cutting out an outline on yourself on a wall isn't cheating.
6.   That maybe Reggie is the victim of Jughead's bullying.
7.   Save my nickels for the future.
8.   Some things should remain a secret when overheard.
9.   Prep Time can overcome anything.
10.   That everyone in Riverdale has no constant form of solid mass.


I'll give this issue a C-. I'm just not feeling this art and a lot of places—it's bad and others it inconsistent and not on model. The writing is still good, but I can't help but think we needed a few more issues of Jughead vs. The Authority before we got to the end with the knife. It just seems we're missing out on so much potential to the main storyline. But the main character and the other characters are written extremely well which helps save this issue somewhat.

So next day will be issue three. Can this series rebound? Will anyone respond? Don't tune in tomorrow to not find out!

 All my friends and family finally paid me the money they owe me...and this time I'm spending it before they get it back! Got a good haul that includes the two Super Suckers issues, the 2015 digest annual, Die, Kitty, Die, and the current run of Jughead 2015. And I do plan on reviewing them all. But I decided to start with Jughead as I've avoided spoilers, but have read about how the art isn't popular. So I'm going to do a one-a-day review for the series.

Jughead is just your average, stay up all night, smart mouth, slacker who wants to float down the stream of life at his own pace. But now with new principal Mr. Stanger and his new changes affect his lunch, Jughead has to do something he's never done before—do something in general.

The Good

1. The writing. I've never read anything from Chip "Killing my spellcheck" Zdarsky, but now I can say the man knows humor. The opening bit with Jughead taking full advantage of a free style game to cause havoc over the night was great. And he has really nailed the Jughead character: he's an anti-hero. He's not a bad guy, but he does not have any goals or real ambition; he just wants to go about his day which consists of: eat, sleep, play games, talk with Archie, and repeat for tomorrow. So pretty much he's The Dude as a teenager with a bit of Dr. House mixed in. I think this version is a little too talky, but it's a new universe Jughead and everything he says is funny, so I'm cool with it.

The other main five are written well: Archie is the everyman who tries to motivate/keep Jughead in check and still is gaga over the girls and has horrible transportation. Betty is caring and the idea of her protesting fits the character, Reggie is a jerk, and Veronica is rich and doesn't do much—but her few lines are really funny. I can just be given a word balloon and figure out who this goes to, which I appreciate in today's comics. My favorite interaction with Jughead and his friends would be with Betty and their conflicting views on...well, just caring and trying to make a difference.

The issue is extremely funny with Jughead's quips and quick wit. It's well paced and flows extremely well. And hey looks like we'll be having a plot. Neat.

2. The art. Okay, I've heard bad things about the art, and yes, I do have a few problems, but this wasn't end of the world bad that everyone has been saying it was. I like how Erica Henderson draws Jughead. Nice, lanky and skinny. The King of Thrones sequence was done well. And I appreciate the mix between Jughead keeping his eyes closed, half way open, or all the way open to illustrate Jughead's anxiety or apathy towards a given situation. And I really liked her Hot Dog. The fashion she has for the teens is really good and her coloring is great. I can see how her art style might not be for everyone, but I don't mind the style. There's something else that bothers me.

3. The Game of Thrones dream. It was fun, and this is coming from someone who doesn't have HBO (that's upper middle class tv viewifying.). But I could get the references and who everyone was supposed to be. And the ending was pretty hilarious with Jughead eating his infinite burgers. And it has a purpose: it gives Jughead the idea on how to deal with the cafeteria food menu. So this isn't just a parody that is just put in the midde of the comic for fun; it serves a purpose to the main story. It's a helpful narrative tool and still fun.

4. Stanger. He's the perfect antagonist for Jughead; an authoritarian figure who does not compromise. And I like how Jughead just jokes once and you can already tell he's Stanger's Hit List. It reminds me of House and Volger from season one of House. I have a feeling their relationship will be: The nail that stands out is hammered down. Jughead and his continued defiance to the changes of Riverdale High School will be fun to read.

5. Hey, an old story! I've heard this is going to be a thing throughout the series so this will be for all future reviews: OLD SCHOOL JUGHEAD RULES. That is to be understood thoughout the reviews. Also to be understood...Mohawk, skateboard loving Jughead did not happen, but Sassy Thrasher is a vastly underrated and underused character. And Curly Joe is the unfunniest stooge, not Shemp.


The Bad.

1. The art. Yeah, the art is not perfect and there are some mistakes that really do bother me. One of them is that a characters head or body changes shape and size. Jughead's nose goes from normal, to long, to pointy, to round over and over. I know this is a different art style, but you do need to stay on model for that style.  An example is Miss Beazley. I couldn't tell who that was in the Game of Thrones sequence until I looked back and saw the strand of hair peaking out through the hairnet/hat. Mr. Weatherbee and Miss Grundy look really weird to me. Hopefully this will improve as she continues her work on the book. And I'm not really a fan of her Betty. I recognized her, but she doesn't look good. Oh, and in one panel where Jughead is starting to sell his burgers...one girl is undead going by her blank eyes...and then no eyes the next. Nitpicky, I know, but I did chuckle at it.

2. Why should I care, old man? Okay, so Mr. Weatherbee is getting replaced by Stanger. Um, yeah, and...? I mean, I've read Archie comics so I know Mr. Weatherbee, just not this version. So I'm guessing he's the same, but a new reader who never read an Archie comic wouldn't know. A new reader wouldn't know the possible history or care. It's just some old guy who got fired. I mean, yeah, you feel bad, but you're not invested, which I find myself not being.

3.  Archie's freckles. Um, they were there for all of one splash page and then they're gone. It's kind of a trademark and a recognizable facial feature so I don't get why they're gone...or there for one instance then gone.

Things I've learned from reading:

Moose is super dumb in this universe.

• Archie has wash away freckles.
• Me and Jughead would not get along playing games. Classic Renegade For Life vs. Paragon 'Til Death.
• Chuck can't cook.
• Riverdale High has one heck of a Student Union.
• Gruel is a thing.
• Dragons like burgers.
• Jughead's subconscious really hates Reggie.
• You can train a dog to pounce on your best friend.
• Miss Crouton is an amazing teacher.

 

So yeah, this was a good issue. And as a first issue it does what it's supposed to: introduce the character and set the tone for the rest of the series. I really enjoyed the writing.  The art, while a bit flawed, was okay, so I don't get the whole—"worse art ever" vibe I've been getting.

I'll go B. Like I said I like the storyline going forward and the art style doesn't bother me, but I should really care more about Mr. Weatherbee losing his job like than I do and the art inconsistencies are distracting. But the characters are written well. Jughead is hilarious, Stanger is a great antagonist, and the coloring and clothing designs are really good.

So tune or...log in...whatever for tomorrow as I review issue two and we'll be one day closer to President Trump.

 Who is the most evil character in all of Archie Comics History?

Reggie Mantle: A mere mischief maker
Zombies and Cthulhu? Meh
The Predator: Evil doesn't use emoticons.
The Greendale Witches. Boring. Unimaginably boring.

What we will soon deal with is an evil unlike which we have ever experienced. A corrupter of souls, a dasher of dreams, he knows not love and is a plague upon the human condition. All sentient life is but toys for him to cruelly amuse himself.

NICK. ST. CLAIR!!!!!


There's a new kid in town and he's NICK ST CLAIR. He's rude, causes trouble, has no respect for authority...and he's dating your best friend. Can Betty and friends help Veronica see that she is in...Bad Boy Trouble?!




The Good.


Nick St. Clair: Oh man is he hilarious. He's so over the top bad you can't help but laugh at what he does!  The poses, his attitude, what he wears is so exaggerated you can't help but laugh. Just how unnecessary bad he is funny? The guy decides to take his time  in the hall, be late, and make horrible jokes or yell at teachers! The best has to be the boxing match with Archie (Yes, you read that right). He's like an evil professional wrestler! From his lame jokes, threats, and constantly hitting on Betty with the worst lines ever he's just so bad he's good!

The art. Well, if you wanted the teens of Riverdale to look more like teens Steven Butler does that. And he does a good job differentiating the characters. Jughead is sporting whiskers, Dilton wearing two piece clothing. I like that you can look at a character and can guess about what age they are. The backgrounds are well done and detailed. And Butler draws an awesome bike. Heck, Betty and Veronica look different enough and each have their own style. Every character has their own body language, poses, and character tics. And inker Al Milgrom's inks just helps bring out the art even more.

The Coloring: Well, no Grossman but Stephanie Vozzo does a great job all the same. The theater scenes are just great. To convey darkness everything is in black and white save for the movie screen that is in full color. That's a great idea that works perfectly. Flashbacks are in blue and black. The colors are bright. I was bothered by Midge suddenly having brown hair...but then again, who does in Archie Comics? Bingo Wilkin? St. Clair?




The Nick St. Clair

The writing: Anyone ever seen a Captain Planet cartoon now combine that with a Saved by the Bell episode and you get about where the writing is. A lot of the story focuses on Betty and she's in super goody mode so yeah, she's kind of flat and boring. Nearly every character save for Nick. St. Clair is flat and boring. I mean, you have a few moments but they are few and far between. Veronica is a cardboard cut out of herself, and save for the first few pages, she has no personality except "He's not bad! You just don't understand him" that we've all seen or read a million times. No dialogue really stands out to help distinguish the characters. You have one moment where Archie is clumsy but after that...he pretty much could be anyone from that point on.

And there so much exposition and stating the moral of the situation that I actually groaned. And let me explain my current situation: My Air and Central Heat is out, it's over eighty degrees...and Dilton going "Well, Nick St. Clair would be in better shape if he didn't skip classes" caused me physical pain. And it just keeps going from there. We get it, Nick St. Clair is baaaad. You don't need to go over and flat out tell us that for pages after the first gazillion times!

This comic was first a novel as you can tell because the pacing can be horrible at points. The story was really stretched out to make it four issues so a lot of scenes that should have had a few more panels of emphasis (like the boxing match or the very end) makes it feel flat. And that probably the origin of all the writing problems (Save one). In a novel, you do have to give detail, explain the emotions, give a history—but comics has a visual aspect where you don't need to do that. Like I said Steven Butler did a great job on art, but the script does not use him to make the comic better.

Should have switched the girls: There was something else that bothered me about this but I couldn't put my finger on it, then I realized something: Betty should have been the one dating St. Clair. Early on Betty was having self doubt about herself and how she stands in the triangle; even silently admitting that Veronica can be sweet as her, but might be more gorgeous. Wouldn't it be more interesting to see this bad boy with Betty? Betty being chosen over Veronica would work in the narrative that was set up earlier. Veronica tries to warn her, but she would see it as jealousy and maybe ruined newly built up confidence. Betty is always put outside of the moral dilemma (Like covering for Veronica and Nick going out and staying late) but since she's the main focus wouldn't it have made more sense for her to be in the dilemma. Like the essay, Nick wants her to write it but Betty would struggle between what is right and wrong. In the story we mainly follow Betty and she's the one who communicates the lessons and whose thoughts we see...but Veronica is dating Nick so the real interesting parts of the story are elsewhere away from the main character.

The art. I didn't recognize Prof. Flutesnoot or Coach Clayton at first. ....Well, I don't want come off like I'm JUST picking on the writing! J


The end: Off panel. Nick is sent to military school and tells Reggie he's sorry for the trouble he caused wants to be a better person. BOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Normally this would be where I talk about the 10 things I've learned from what I read, but for this...

THE TOP TEN EVIL NICK. ST. CLAIR MOMENTS!!!

Being from New Jersey.

• Yelling at Ms. Grundy
• His no regards for cafeteria and those in it (Cutting in line, swiping sandwiches without paying, and stealing Dilton's dessert! THE FIEND)
• Cheapshotting Archie after the bell had rung to end the boxing round
• Constantly making moves on Betty while dating Veronica (Veronica's rich, but he likes blonds)
• Sneaking into the movies
• Keeping Veronica out late at a club and forcing Betty to cover for them.
• The goatee and leatherjacket
• Having Veronica write his 2,000 word English Lit essay for him
• The chicken liver joke

 

This is interesting little problem. I really like the art aspects of the story—but I detest the writing. It's just not up to par. But you know what...I still kind of like this story. Mainly because of how over the top Nick St. Clair is. I just couldn't help but laugh at his antics. I see this trade like a bad movie almost. And like I said, I really like the art and coloring. I admit there are moments where you roll your eyes, but I think the good out ways the bad enough.

I'll go C+

And next week up on the docket is Jughead: Match—forget that, I'll review The Man from R.I.V.E.R.D.A.L.E instead.

 Love is such a wonderful thing—until the woman you love betrays you for your best friend, ruining years of friendship, burning a bridge that can never be repaired. Man, I'm going to miss watching NFL Games on that 70 in HD TV come Fall...

A misunderstanding has lead to the break-up of Riverdale's most true couple, Moose and Midge. Can Archie, Betty, and friends find a way to bring these two back together or drive them further apart.




The Good:

Moose and Midge: I really like when they get the focus of the story put on them without Betty going on and on about the message of the few pages. And the break-up is logical. Midge wanted to test her love while Moose didn't see  a need to; Midge wanted to hear the words steady, while Moose was of the mindset that he didn't have to say the words. These two hardly ever get any focus in the Archieverse so it was fun to have a story that centered around them. Both are likeable and well written. You don't really take a side because both had reasonable arguments and both are equally stubborn and prideful. You get backstory on how they fell in love and for how long. I understand they're not Archie or in the main cast, but if they had gotten more page time this would have been a much better story for it.

Good character moments from Archie and the gang. Yeah, they're normally boring and most of the fun characters (Veronica, Jughead, Reggie) don't get much page time like they should but you do have some good moments. Jughead relating how missing out on food is like feeling like it's a part of life you just missed, Veronica gets few pages, but she's super fun in them. Reggie is a cowardly rogue, Archie is clumsy and it factors into the story. My favorite would be the end in the dance club with Betty becoming jealous of Veronica and frustrated by her antics. Too bad most of the story is just Betty being boring and Archie following along.

Tod Smith: I like his art for the most part. Again the characters look like teenagers. I like how he draws Reggie. And I like some of the over exaggerated poses of Betty because—it's the few things I found interesting about her in this story. The body language for each character is spot on as Veronica just demands your attention while Jughead is slumped over. I really like how he draws Moose, almost like Frankenstein's monster. There is one problem: His Archie is kind of weird at points. But luckily Archie is normally with Betty so it's nice to be interested in something. Yes, Betty bores me this much in this story I'll take what I can get to find interesting moments.


The messages. I don't have a problem with stories giving a message. I think every story should have some lesson it was to convey. My problem is when you are beating the reader over and over and explaining it to them word by word without letting them put in the cognitive thought process on their own. And there are some good messages. Like sometimes you need to back off and let your friends work out their problems themselves. That's a good message. It's just that most messages in the New Look are teaching you a lesson instead of entertaining you. And, I got to be honest, I was used to Webb stories where Veronica is evil and Betty is super duper nice—it was nice where Veronica actually had the right idea compared to leave things be and let what happens happen. It was rare at the time.

Betty's cussing and overreactions. Seriously, she cussed in this?! I mean, it's censored but—at least it's funny to think of. And Betty's Home Alone pose when trouble happens or things backfire was funny. Seriously, if I was Tod Smith, and reading this script, I'd do stuff like this to have some fun when it comes to Betty in this story.


The Bad:

Betty: Exposition, exposition, tell the message, have no personalitttty...! That's her purpose in the story. She gives information on backstory, how long something has happened, we get to see what she is thinking and her thoughts. And for most of the story—yeah, she's as boring as you'd expect. And there's so much unnecessary information like how she worries about here feelings, or thinking something—and then a character tells the information. An example would be Rocco and the South side kids with her thining who they are and then Dilton and Jughead telling. And again it's the same problem of with Bad Boy Trouble—she's not involved in the crisis of the story, Moose and Midge is. Where we could have more focus on those two, we have Betty telling us what's going on and how we should feel.

The Writing. Just like Bad Boy Trouble you have really the same problem of this originally being a novel and it shows. It's unnecessarily wordy and the pacing can be just plain slow. And again it just beats you over the head with their messages that you just want to scream at points. And some of the dialogue—wow. We got some groan worthy stuff. And there's a point where Midge goes home, and the next page Midge's mother lectures Archie and Betty—how did Midge go over everything so fast?! She had to be in the house only ten seconds top! I mean I don't want to constantly harp on Melanie because she does some good things. Like Moose and Midge. When they get the focus or in the story it's really good. But key elements of the story are just not focused on. And I don't even know why Jughead was in this story at all. He serves no point and annoyed me all but once.

Characters that just exist. The Turner Twins are there to snitch about Midge's date with Reggie and then at the end...actually they didn't even need to be mentioned at all. Judy Johnson, whom Moose dates for a time, we don't really get much from her other than the standard boring new girl who a character falls for like you would in Save by the Bell. I guess I appreciate that she seemed really nice, but she's forgettable all the same.

Midge's hair: Okay, she has black hair on the cover, kinda redish purple, and brown...c'mon, we can do better than that! Stick with a hair color. I mean the rest of the coloring is fine, but this kind of thing is just inexcusable.



What I learned from reading this:

The Turner Twins are snitches.

• Rocco from the South Side, while a punk, has a pretty good memory as he remembers Archie from over a month ago.
• You can beat up whomever you want how badly...as long as it's in the boxing ring of the Riverdale Community Center
• Betty knows a cuss word
• Moose and Midge are the third best dancers in all of Riverdale with no practice together!
• No empty seats, sit on a lap!

 
How to get your two friends back together? Fake a leg cramp and act like you need rescuing.
 
C'mon, Midge—you and Moose WERE ON A BREAK!!!
 
When a woman dates another guy not her boyfriend; she's experimenting.
 
Detention Room Romance is the number one rom-com that all women subject their men to. Multiple times.
 
This is weird because when Moose and Midge are in the story, I really, really like it. It's fun, energetic. But then you have the parts where they're not and most of them are boring because Betty is the relation point for the reader to convey information...and she's so boring for the most part. But again, I consider art more important than writing (Sorry, Stan Lee). I liked the last New Series story because of how bad it's funny Nick St. Clair was but Moose and Midge were actually fun and relatable characters. I'll go B-
So we're at least improving when it comes to the New Look stories. So how bad can MatchMakers possibly be?

 Mission: To read Man From R.I.V.E.R.D.A.L.E.
Objectives:
Speak of the good

• Speak of the bad
• Try not to ham up the summary

 

Archie Andrews is your typical ham-fisted, clumsy teen—that is until his cousin Andy comes for a visit. Turns out Andy is an agent of P.O.P (Protect Our Planet) and is on a mission to stop C.R.U.S.H. (Criminal Recruits United to Spread Havoc) who has aligned with old foe Mad Doctor Doom. With P.O.P. neutralized and Riverdale dazed, can Archie becomes THE MAN FROM R.I.V.E.R.D.A.L.E. and save the day?

Two out of three isn't bad.

The Good.

The Writing. Tom DeFalco provides us with the script and he knocks it out of the park. Every character is distinguishable. Archie sounds like Archie and even though he's the hero he still has his traditional moments of going gaga for girls and being clumsy. Jughead is Jughead. And I swear, Chuck is actually interesting and is part of one of the funniest moments near the end of the story. I could pick out a word balloon and you can guess pretty accurately who it came from. The story flows and is packed with little tidbits. This is a fun story that balances comedy and tension really world. The heroes were behind most of the time and had to work to overcome the villain in typical fun Archie fashion. And you can tell, DeFalco loves the old school stories and it really brought Mad Doctor Doom to life. I'll be honest, I was never a fan of the spy stories, but I really enjoyed this story. It's funny, it has a great story, and an imaginative end. I can't do this justice, it's great writing from Tom DeFalco.

The art: It's Fernando Ruiz so, yeah, naturally this will be awesome. This story is just great to look at. Everything is well done: The characters, the settings, buildings. You can tell he was just having a blast with this story. And I love all the background events. And this story is packed with them! An alien hiding in a garbage bin and later trying to escape a few pages later to teenagers doing stupid stuff, everything you could want is there to make you go back and see what you missed. You see a good slew of Archie favorite characters...and Raj (tee-hee I kid, I kid). And it's nice to see more Ruiz favorite characters get panel time because it's usually Parent favored characters in most comics. You even get to see Raj's dad. The Walking Dazed walk like zombies, characters have their own body language (like Chester and his fixation with his hair and looks). This story really competes with Cyrano Jones, which I considered his best work. Note the past tense because we have a new number one.


Archie: Have you ever heard of the term, "For every wall there is a door"? If you haven't it means that if you wait, keep trying, and endure, you'll eventually breakthrough. That's Archie in the story. He's told he can't do this, he's not ready, he's not good enough, but he just won't quit. When his friends are in trouble he picks himself off the ground and goes back for more. He's outclassed by the villains who have the numbers, the plan, and everything else, but Archie wins through determination and a bit of luck. You still have the traditional going gaga over the girls and being a clutz, but when things get serious, it's believable for Archie to step up to fight back. Even most people who don't like Archie will find him likeable in this story. He's just a great hero. And the growth is great, Andy keeps telling he can't and near the end when Andy tells him to let the professionals handle it now, Archie's response: "Yeah! They've been doing a great job so far!" If you like Archie's Weird Mysteries or the older stories where Archie has to step up to foil a robbery or catch a thief this Archie is for you.




The Villains: A hero is only as good as his villains and the bad guys in this story are really good. Mad Doctor Doom is great. He has a great look, he poses an actual threat to the heroes, and he's intelligent. I love when Chester comments how C.R.U.S.H. can take over the world with the daze formula and the next panel is Mad Doctor Doom shifts his eyes.  He's the perfect mix of goofy looking and scary.

Sharry the Spy Girl. I've seen Ruiz draw her in a few stories and I never got why he liked her so much. Well, now I do. She's a fun character. Again, she's intelligent and poses a threat, but she's distinguished from Mad Doctor Doom in her playfulness (her trolling of Reggie must be seen, it's so hilarious), she's loyal to her fellow agents, and she does have enough grasp on morality when circumstances get out of hand that she'll help the good guys.


The rest of the villains are fun. Crammer and Cranston are the typical goons, but they aren't total idiots and Crammer has a fun accent. They're not on the level of Mad Doctor Doom or Sharry, but they are at least capable and even when they blunder it benefits the villains. Chester is a good sidekick to Mad Doctor Doom...but man he kinda got creepy with the captured Betty and Veronica. I'm talking Archie Comics TMNT and MM Null level of ick. But it does help him stand out.

The inker, lettering, and coloring. Rich Koslowski is one of Archie's better inkers and he really helps bring out Ruiz's art and help give it an extra spring. Jack Morelli really steps up his game with his work especially when he colors and boldens the story. I hate when word balloons have colors around them, but here they make sense like with the security system for P.O.P. and Archie's reaction and I like how words are enlarged and colored to show their importance like Mad Doctor Doom when his name is first mentioned and when he later goes over the name of his plan to take over the world. Tom Chu does a great job with the coloring, the colors are bright and fun, I like the tint of purple he gave the dazed characters. He made me not miss Barry Grossman and if you know me that's an accomplishment.

Extras: We get an old timey story in traditional newspaper strip with Andy Andrews is a fun little story. Words from Tom DeFalco and Fernado Ruiz and art and sketches where Ruiz and what his ideas where and what changed and why.


The Bad.

A little explanation on Lil' Archie and Mad Doctor Doom's history would have helped: If you're a new reader to Archie Comics or not familiar or a fan of Lil' Archie you'll probably wonder what's up with Mad Doctor Doom not liking Archie and deeming him a threat to ruin his plan over everything else. I think a panel or two explaining and showing what has happened in the past would have benefited the readers.

Crammer's accent comes and goes: Vat is up vith that? Okay, it was just two times...I gotta fill the section out somehow!!

Something bad about the art. Okay to be fair I should find something Ruiz did wrong... I don't like how he made me feel about Beazley.

What I learned.

If you twirl round 'n' round like Wonder Woman you can disguise yourself as anyone

• A teenager and his friends >>>> all our government's agencies including their secret ones
• Tough Teddy transferred to Riverdale High.
• All bookstores are the cover for hidden secret organizations.
• Never hire and fund an evil scientist for any project that involves easy means to take over the world
• Spies get all the cool toys
• Chicken soup cures everything
• Bad girl spies are hot
• So that's who the Riverdale Bulldog Mascot is!
• Honorary Agents of P.O.P. are color coded like any teenage group of heroes.

 




This is probably the best Archie story I've read. I can't think of anything that can go against it. Everything just clicks from the writing to the art to the coloring to the lettering to the inking. It's all great. I can't really think of any Archie story that comes close to this one. And that's not counting the great extras. This an A+ and you should buy this story.  You won't regret it.

I agree with that. I don't really understand the idea of upsetting your base readers. DC Comics has done that and they continue to lose millions of dollar and I think only Batman is their constant top ten seller.

And this the perfect time in the comic industry to do it because of how well and how many  nonsuperhero books there are. I think the original Archie book should have remained at the very least.

Now that I've finally got a few issues of Reboot Archie. If I had to choose...I'd probably lean towards classic. The Reboot Archie book is amazing. I really like it--unfortunately the Jughead book brings the reboot series down. The first four issues are night and day.

I'm willing to give this show a chance. That...and I think it'll be like Gotham, so bad that I laugh my head off.

Quote from: invisifan on April 04, 2016, 06:50:29 PM
What would Erica H come up with if asked to draw "ugly"?  Do we want to know? Anyway, she's leaving so hopefully we won't have to ...

Ethel? Tall, skinny, good at sports, nice, but low self-esteem — I'd say she mostly chases Jug because she wants a boyfriend and he's conspicuously unattached ... no one is chasing her and she doesn't believe she can compete — you don't need ugly for that ...

I actually liked the older version who took the universe just piling on her in stride. The low esteem thing happened mostly with Al Hartley. Mr. !!! at the end of every sentence.