Since the Barbie movie from 2023 has become a hit alongside with Oppenheimer which lead to the "Barbenheimer" trend, although Oppenheimer became a best picture for the Oscars. I thought I will give my take of what a Archie movie would be like if it follows the trend of the Barbie as the film is both a parody and love letter to the Barbie toy franchise which should be the same for Archie comics as its known for its characters and universe with its slice of life and surreal escapades and its changing trends over the years and that it must reflect on its history and its tropes of their stories like the never ending love triangle for example especially that its mostly famous for what it's truly known for , Humor and laughter which in other words comedy . So here is a pitch of what an Archie movie is like if it receives a barbie movie like treatment.


The film will start off  in 1941 where the narrator gives  the symbolical history of comic books which is mostly populated with the popular genre superheroes that everyone reads  them but some bored  and some want something different but then came one person appearing in the scene and riding in his bike is the golden age Archie Andrews nicknamed Chick who does the similar thing in his first appearance in a bike  and he does funny slapsticks that people laughed and liked it that  they ignore some of the superheroes  and begin to read Archie instead .

And after the title card "Archie" , we see Archie and the gang in their original 1940-s 1950s forms  along with the town of Riverdale , they go through various versions all over  the years like the 1980s version, the spy version The man from Riverdale, the child version of archie and the gang Little Archie, the superhero version super teens , Al Hartley's religious version of Archie , the 1970s filmation limited animation version,  the zombie afterlife with archie version along with Archie horror versions , the surreal CW "like it or hate it" Riverdale series and much more and the narrator states that the Archie comics may be outdated in this current era  but they are still ongoing and thriving ever since .

We then cut to the town of Riverdale  in a form of a different comic book dimension separated  from the real world where many versions of Archie and the gang  lived including , Josie and the pussycats, That Wilkin boy, the MLJ heroes like the shield , black hood, the fox, Sabrina  and more and although the 1950 to the 2000s Archie versions  lived there, they aged but interact each other very well, they can even interact with the previous and current version of the archie and the gang along with MLJ superheroes .

And speaking of the current version , we are then introduced to this current version of archie Andrews who is the modern version of Archie but follows through his predecessors traditions in typical shenanigans  like going to high school, dealing with the never ending  betty and veronica love triangle , end up in crazy shenanigans that lead to trouble like  with Mr. Weatherbee and Mr. Lodge, hanging out with the gang in the chocklit shop ,  beach parties and even interact with holiday themed archie characters like Jingles and Sugarplum and different versions of the Archie and the gang.

 And through out the first half, Archie went through his usual routine but slowly he gets bored and he begins to question the logic of this world and the situations around it, that's when the next day as Archie goes through his typical routine he does some things normal and this is a problem for him that the whole gang and even the other versions of archie himself in this world consider him "a freak" , so Archie with the advice from his friends Jughead , the teen genius Dilton and Sabrina the teenage witch  went to a different and discontinued version of Jughead from the early 1990s a nod to the Jughead who is infamous for his outdated skate punk appearance and seek his advice , the 90s jughead suggested Archie to go to the Real world and interact with the creator of him (the current version) to remove his current problem.

So Archie went on his journey to the real world along with Jughead and Betty and Veroncia who are coming along with him by having their witchy friend Sabrina and Dilton create a dimensional gate  that is shaped like a comic book panel and enter our world through a sealed comic book in a comic book shop  and with Archie entering our world to find his creator, Reggie Archie's rival who is jealous of Archie's popularity in the real world and the town of Riverdale decided to conquer the world of Riverdale and became the popular top guy in comic book history , he gathered various version of Reggie's like Evilheart, Dr. doom (not the marvel one but the mad scientist type) and the MLJ supervillains took over the world of Riverdale and imprison versions of Archie and the gang so Reggie and his different versions will continue their reign.

In the real world ,Archie and the gang are finding the creator of his current version but end up in wacky situations until Archie meets a young, troubled kid named Brian , who turns out he doesn't read Archie comics because the Archie  comic books still feels outdated especially that it turns out he is related to the current Archie's creator, so Archie and his friends went to Archie comics (which unlike the real life office version is a fancy comic book building like Marvel and DC) and they have to go secretly through a tour , when Archie unknowingly is separated from the tour , he saw a room called the hall of creators revolving around the people who created Archie and the gang consisting of  publishers Maurice Coyne, Louis Silberkleit, John L. Goldwater and his creator who is responsible for creating archie in the first place that began with the golden age version  Bob Montana , Archie was surprised when an old security guard named Chick who wears a familiar bowtie is impressed that Archie admires the creators and Publishers in this room like himself as he thinks of them as family , but then Archie's best friend  Jughead appears and ask Archie why he is cutting off from the tour group before Archie gives Jughead an explanation , the security guard Chick disappeared.

As the Archie's gang reached to the CEO's office when they see his creator Brian's dad having a conversation with the CEO  a parody of the current CEO of Archie comics about some suggestive pitches to the Archie comics when the CEO and his executives are shocked that the current Archie  and the gang are in the real world that they must recapture them and put them in a sealed book which claimed will return them to their world, Archie and the gang in panic  run for their lives, a chase ensues and as Archie and the gang along with Brian hide out in the comic book shop they noticed that there are no Archie comics but "Reggie comics" instead, the gang and Barry decided to quickly return to Riverdale by finding a Archie comic that sends them to the real world while at the same time the CEO of Archie comics fears have happened , without Archie in his Riverdale world ,Reggie has taken over Riverdale and the comic book line,  so they must find a path to where Archie comes from and put an end to it.

Meanwhile Archie ,Brian and the gang have found the comic book which remains unchanged  and use its page to send them back to Riverdale, Brian's father who secretly follow them enters the world of Riverdale and is amazed that he is the world of Archie Comics and as Brians father and his son continue bickering with Archie trying to calm things down, they are caught by the citizens of Riverdale who are forced under the iron grip of Reggie Mantle, he sentenced Archie , Jughead, Betty and Veronica and Brian and his father  to detention in Riverdale high school for life and sit next to 90's Jughead ,Sabrina (who is now powerless) ,Dilton and some discontinued characters of Archie comics,  Archie feels like hope is lost and useless but then his friends , Brian and even his dad tells him not to give up, that's when hope came and it was little Reggie who unlike his current teenage counterpart is kind to Archie and is considered a big brother and with that Archie and the gang made their escape and he got an idea.

The gang secretly sneak on the guards , make them lose consciousness, give Sabrina her powers back, equip with some of Dilton's inventions and release every characters of Archie's Riverdale gang including the superheroes, Sabrina and all the versions of the Archie gang form as an army and take down Reggie's Army to liberate Riverdale  and the final battle begins in a hilarious slapstick manner, such as Reggie summoning the zombies from After life with Archie but they got attracted to various pizzas and Burgers  made by jughead and Pop Tates and run towards them, Sabrina using her magic to turn some Reggie loyalists into frogs , Dilton uses his portal trap to send the goons into another planet with a cameo from Cosmo and after seeing that the fighting has gone too far,  Archie puts an end to this chaos with some touching speech and so  the citizens of Riverdale stop fighting , admitting their flaws and form a truce, thus Riverdale is saved, the Reggies, the superheroes and even versions of Archie make peace, but the current Reggie didn't' get away Scott free since he started all this trouble that he instead ends up in Detention for life .

And with peace in Riverdale restored,  most of the characters conflicts  have been resolved, Brian and his dad get together, the CEO of Archie comics who appeared  in Riverdale trying to prevent this mess is relieved that Riverdale is back to normal and that he accept Brian's dad idea of a different take of Archie who appeared in Riverdale , Betty and Veronica resolve their conflict and stalking of Archie, Jughead decides to overcome his fear of girls and confess his love to Ethel and the 90's jughead is now respected by  whole of Riverdale and gain some of his fans like Brian's dad  who consider him a cult favorite, but the current Archie felt that his conflict isn't resolved which is when Chick the security guard of Archie comics comes in and to the Archie Comics CEO's surprise it's revealed that Chick is really the original  golden age Archie himself as shown when Chick unzip his security guard jacket revealing to be the iconic "R" vest.

It's revealed when the 1950's version of Archie came , the original Archie and the gang decided to enjoy retirement, but the original Archie thought of going to the real world and admire the changes  both good and bad which is why he use his original name of Chick and became a security guard of Archie Comics where he will see how the comic book industry  went in progress until his passing many years later. But the real reason the golden Age Archie came to Riverdale , he needs to speak to the current Archie because the creators the "original ones" want to speak to him , the original Archie showed the current version to the chocklit shop and opens a secret doorway,  there huge stairs will lead to the big comic book studio in the sky and the original archie helps his current self climb to the top and inside the studio , the audience will be introduced to the people who  created Archie comics the publishers Maurice Coyne, Louis Silberkleit, John L. Goldwater and the cartoonist the man who gave birth to Archie and the gang Bob Montana, the publishers  in the movie are depicted as some ruff business bosses  with a gentler heart of gold as they ordered their  employee Bob  to draw some funny stories for  Archie and the gang , the golden age Archie tells his creators that the current version is here now , and this is when we hear the heartwarming moment when the current Archie talk to the creators about his own conflict that he questions the surrounding of his world, his existence  and his life around him , and wonders if it's time to leave Riverdale and "grow up" , Bob Maurice, Louis and John like parents to their children give some advice , they know that in the comics Archie and the gang are meant to be eternal teenagers and bring humor to generation of readers around the world including India, but sometimes nothing last forever, as things have change and so is Archie  along with the company as they add horror titles in its publications which is one of the reasons the golden age Archie goes to the real world and spend his time there witnessing the changes all over the years and even if one version of the Archie and the gang are replaced by another the thing that makes them Archie like Comedy  which brings laughs to many generation will never fade away, and like that Archie's conflict is resolved and he is ready to grow up and decides what he is going to do next and like that Archie waves good bye to his creator Bob Montana and the publishers  Maurice, Louis and John and climb downstairs with "Chick"

We then cut to the real world sometime later where Archie settles there  to "grow up" and use the nickname "Bob" (named after his creator Bob Montana) , took the job as janitor in Brian's school so he can hang out with him and see how life changes in the real world, he even makes contact to his friends from the Riverdale world  to see how they are doing and they are doing fine and the last scene ends with Archie with his nickname "Bob" having a friendly chat with his friend Brian when someone slipped to a wet floor Archie forgot to put a warning sign similar to the usual Archie comics humor  and screamed his name in anger, causing Archie to react in fear in a funny way.

The end credits will be snippets of archie comic books through out history including the end credits with a modern fun remix of Sugar, Sugar which is the Archies popular song.


What do you think?